lifeawakened

a whirlwind of a weekend

2008-11-24T10:06:00.003-07:00

God is always teaching me things when I least expect it. One of those things was this past weekend. I got to spend 48 hours with some of the coolest teenagers in New Mexico at one of my favorite places in the world.

The small group I helped out with was probably the best one yet. We talked about REALLY tough stuff but that is what you get when the entire camp is about asking the tough questions. Suddenly on Saturday morning there were tough questions floating around the room. There were struggles with the death of friends. There were struggles with the possibility of having cancer. There were all sorts of things that I wasn't prepared for but that turned out to be absolutely amazing.

On Saturday night we participated in a simulation called the Underground Church Experience. It was a powerful experience for all of us and I walked away with the realization that no matter how difficult this job can get, the impact that I can have on teenagers and the impact that they can have on me is HUGE.

I'm about to hop on a plane to see my family, but I'll leave you with our group shot on Sunday morning. I love these youth (and youth sponsors) tons and tons!

Ridiculousness

2008-11-20T12:28:00.000-07:00

So my friend Jenny's boyfriend decided to make an Elf Yourself of a bunch of friends of mine from high school. I've watched it about a million times so far just cracking up. So I figured I should share. Really, Brian just has way too much time on his hands.

Click here to watch...

halloween explosion

2008-10-28T13:10:00.001-06:00

My office is a war zone. A halloween carnival exploded in here sometime last week...

officially a youth director...

2008-08-10T22:51:00.004-06:00

So my youth group while growing up was pretty good at destroying things. Or at least a few members were. Broken windows, pulling an entire sink off the wall, completely unloading a fire extinguisher on an empty room...

So far I haven't had too much trouble with my youth... but this month has just been the kicker. Having to send kids home from events, having to get on them about other stuff... and then this...

So it was an accident, but there is a LARGE hole in the wall of the hall way upstairs. What got my goat was that there wasn't an immediate coming forward of the boys that did it. I didn't get a solid confession until today. That's the part that irks me. You mess up, you come tell me and we'll work it out.

Thankfully pretty much all of the people that run the church thought it was pretty darn funny. My anger on Friday night did not think that whatsoever.

It certainly could have been worse, and won't be a tough fix, but certainly made for an exciting weekend I'd say. One of my youth sponsors commented to me that even though I have been on the job for a year, I wasn't officially a youth director until Friday when we knocked a serious hole in the wall.

awesome day at the botanical gardens

2008-06-19T15:34:00.002-06:00

I had a play date with the Christian Ed director to just go hang out and wander around the botanical gardens here in town. Here are some pictures from our morning. We then went and had lunch at one of my favorite places, Sunshine Cafe. The potato soup today was seriously to DIE for. Finished it up with some empanadas from the bakery across the street, it was an awesome morning.

camp update

2008-06-18T09:20:00.003-06:00

I should get to some pictures and an update from Costa Rica this afternoon. I feel like a chicken with its head cut off running around trying to finish up stuff for Junior High camp... but here are some pictures from sr. high camp. It was awesome. Tex Sample blew me away and spending time with 4 of my girls was amazing.

There was one incident involving bees and the medevac helicopter but thankfully everyone is a ok.

Now for pictures...

My girls thought I looked funny enjoying part of my dinner...

Waiting for the helicopter to come down.

Med Evac! It was actually pretty cool especially because everyone is ok.

Meeting as a group to pray for the people at the hospital.

Worship!

cool link

2008-05-25T23:09:00.002-06:00

I went to this event last year and a friend from that event posted this. It was actually a huge factor in my decision to be where I am at today and just a darn cool event.

I love the picture because I have crazy memories of hanging out with Earl and Jim, two of the guys featured in the picture who helped lead the event. Good times. It also was good to know that the event happened again this year as they were talking about not having funding towards the end of our stay in 2007. It was an invaluable experience for me and so many of the others on the trip.

my glamorous job...

2008-05-20T16:35:00.002-06:00

I spent the greater part of today duct taping these New Testaments for our mission team. 40 of them. Each took 10 minutes or so. My hands hurt...

to my readers...

2008-05-11T22:15:00.002-06:00

At this time, I have to say that I really have been taking quite the blog sabbatical. It has been a really busy few months and I am dealing with some stuff which takes away from my time of writing. I just don't have it in me to really continue writing much.

In case you're wondering how work is, it is fantastic. I'm filled with graduations this week and looking foward to heading to Costa Rica really soon. Summer camp is on the horizon, and a summer full of hanging out with youth is coming near. I could not have asked for a better first year of being in youth ministry and am excited about the upcoming years as well.

Hopefully I will be able to get back into the groove of writing soon, but it just hasn't happened. I apologize, and can't make promises with how much stuff I cram into my schedule, but I will sure make an effort to get back on the blogging horse in the near future.

a true resident of Albuquerque...

2008-02-26T19:46:00.002-07:00

Well... I now feel like a true resident of Albuquerque. When I moved here... my parents were a little nervous about me moving to the city most viewed on the tv show COPS. I wasn't going to be able to afford a cell phone, but they felt I was going to be living in a dangerous city, so they kept paying for my cell phone while I was a missionary.

This morning I went out to my car... and my spare tire on the back of the car was gone. It did not make for the best of moods. By the end of the day I had replaced it by calling a friend of a friend who called a few salvage yards for me. I had gas stolen out of my car at some point, but somehow the tire was a much bigger deal to me. I lucked out and got a pretty decent tire for not too much.

So I spent a lot of my day really working through how I felt about it all. I mean, I'm thankful my car was still there obviously. And I'm thankful I have friends who help me out and give me people to call and get things squared away without ripping me off.

I'm currently in the middle of writing a massive amount of curriculum for confirmation, working on a presentation about missions for both a group of youth workers as well as for our confirmation retreat for the conference, have been working on curriculum for camp and still have to do my normal youth ministry stuff. I'm feeling slightly overwhelmed and though I have lots of time to write all of that stuff, writing for me has been on the backburner. I also managed to suffer through a chest cold last week that just about took me down for the count for most of last week. But of course, things keep going and I am much better now and moving on with the rest of spring.

I will be so thankful when it hits summer because I get to spend more time with my youth hopefully and not be running around trying to get a million things done. Or maybe I will. Who knows, but right now looking at the summer is keeping me going at the moment.

Fasting and CCYM

2008-02-12T13:16:00.001-07:00

Well I had an amazing weekend with my youth. It is truly a blessing to be working with the youth that I have. On Saturday night, usually I have to pray with a few youth after a moving experience. This is really not my strong point. What I mean by that is that I am not someone who expresses my emotions outwardly. This can make it somewhat awkward to be praying with youth who are crying their eyes out. As I sat with my youth on Saturday, I watched as many of them began praying together. I sat back and saw God moving through them in a way that I hadn't seen before. I got to witness an outpouring of community that I hadn't seen in a long time. It was truly a blessing to be about to go and pray and supplement what was going on, but on the whole I let the youth do their own thing in caring for one another which was truly powerful.

On Friday, I had my first day of fasting during lent. It wasn't nearly as difficult as I thought it might end up being. There were a few times where I got a little bit testy... but mainly because it was late and after 5 hours of driving and nearing 30 hours with no food it gets a little difficult to not let your emotions get the best of you.

When I woke up on Saturday morning I really had this somewhat amazing feeling deep within me like nothing could stir up my soul. We began Saturday morning with communion, and to me, the first day of trying this Lenten discipline out was really highlighted by the fact that I was able to experience a moving understanding of Christ's sacrifice. It was an amazing way to start this all off.

Of course I have one more trip to camp 2 weeks before Easter in which I have to do the same thing of fasting on Friday and then head down with the junior high group. That one should be interesting as well. In a lot of ways that will really be a time for me to bond with our junior high group. I spend a lot of time with my senior high as they have the ability to get around and come in more often, but my junior high doesn't have that opportunity nearly to the extent of the senior high. I'm excited for that to happen because I've been to camp 4 times now with the senior high and only once with the junior high. It should be a great way to grow deeper with them and get to know them a bit better.

Well back to confirmation prep. It has snuck up on me and I have LOTS to try and get done today. I already know I will have youth in my office tomorrow afternoon so I need to try and get a lot done today. Woo hoo!

The beginning of Lent

2008-02-07T10:54:00.000-07:00

There is something powerful that happens on Ash Wednesday in my mind and spirit. I can be going through the motions of the day, and suddenly I am reminded of my death, I am reminded that I came from dust, and one day I will return.

The powerful experience of having a pastor look into your eyes and tell me that I am dust is one that really rocks me to the core. A lot of people miss out on this experience because many churches never emphasize that this piece is important. But for me, the resurrection cannot happen without it. There have been a few times where I haven't made it to an Ash Wednesday service and it has changed my whole perspective on the season of Lent during that year.

I think for a lot of people, they miss out on the understanding of the season of Lent because they don't really see these rituals as important. And really, to each his own, but if you've never attended an Ash Wednesday service, you probably should at some point in your life.

Normally I take something up for Lent, and usually it is a really obvious thing, but this year something different has been on my heart. My youth director when I was in high school would fast from Maundy Thursday until Easter morning every year. Well I decided to give that a shot and also plan to fast on Fridays during Lent. I even have a support system because last night I was talking to a friend who had decided to do the same thing. I think that the spiritual discipline of fasting is one that can be really revelatory and I figure now is as good at any time to commit to trying it out.

Of course tomorrow is the first test of my fasting on Fridays because I'm headed down to camp with 14 teenagers. I'll manage all right but it will certainly be tempting with food floating around the van and a fast food stop on the way down. I have a feeling that breakfast on Saturday won't be a missed meal like it sometimes is at camp...

I'm hoping it is a good experience and that I get a lot out of it, but it will certainly be a challenge, but one that I'm ready for.

Extreme Makeover... Home Edition

2008-01-21T19:52:00.000-07:00

So my friends Halecia and Erin joined me today on an excursion to find Ty Pennington. Of course we didn't see him, but it was really quite cool to go to the set of Extreme Makeover Home Edition.

They have been here this past week rebuilding a home in Albuquerque and this is the first chance I've had to go check it out. Apparently the inside is really quite awesome, but from the outside it isn't too thrilling.

So here are my not so great camera phone pictures....

They were trying to get a balloon up for a promo but the wind was less than cooperative.

The church on one side of the property that they are building.

The house on the other side.

A closer shot of the church area. Definitely very cool.

an awesome time at PSYM

2008-01-15T21:36:00.000-07:00

So I did make it back from Dallas at the end of last week and have been working my tail off the last few days to catch up with work stuff. Unfortunately, I am no where near caught up and still have an obscene amount of work to complete before the end of the week. Here are a few pictures from the event, some stolen from other PSYMer's and I will give credit where it is due...

This was our art project when we did a worship service on grief. Amazing... it is hard to describe how this piece of art came about, but if you want to know, just ask. It was by far the most moving experience of the weekend I would say.

These are the super awesome early bird people! Tweet tweet! Basically we all came early and did art and liturgical dance stuff. It was a rockin good time.

This was the fun table plus me. I sat in front of them and turned around a lot. Left to right... Lizzie, Casey, Erin, Me, Cathy, and Dexter. Dexter will probably be on the tv show "So you think you can dance." And then I will know a celebrity.

Haha we tried really hard to make this picture work but basically we all look kind of crazy. L to R... Erin's eye, Joseph, me, Lizzie, Casey, Halecia, Cathy.

Yes... my signature dance move. Or, ridiculousness. The essence is lost in a picture, but I laugh that Casey had this picture.

I think the blurriness in this picture happened because we were far too awesome to be caught on film. Lizzie and Casey rocked the hardcore 80s fun. I just came along for the ride.

What can I say... youth directors make funny faces sometimes!

Our Foundations class clearly rocked enough to take a picture. It was good times hanging out with Rod, Georgia, Walt and Joy.

Basically all the pictures post early bird I stole from Casey. She won't mind though because the one basic rule of youth ministry we learned was to borrow ideas (and pictures are really ideas right?)

I also came home with something else... a hand me down table that my brother said was my dad's mom's at one point. Basically it is just one more place for me to get work done. As you can see, I have wasted no time in using it to the fullest of my abilities. I can imagine that it will only get more use from here on out and is no longer sitting in my brother's garage. The plus side for him is that he won't have to move it to New Jersey.

So that was my week. I didn't really feel like I learned a ton, but the relationships I got out of it are invaluable. Afterall, the one thing they stressed (other than feel free to borrow things in youth ministry...) was relationships, relationships, relationships. I can't wait to go back next year!

so...

2008-01-05T23:15:00.000-07:00

A lot has happened since I last wrote on Dec. 19th. I went and spent the holidays with mi familia in Bourbonnais, I had a lock in with my youth, I attended a wedding, I made a website for my youth (it isn't quite done yet, but is getting there). I have played ridiculous amounts of Super Paper Mario.

Yesterday I drove 10 hours so I could be at Perkins School of Youth Ministry for the early bird event. So far I've bet a bunch of awesome youth directors and am fairly convinced that UM youth directors might be a little off their rocker but are always fun. I'm hanging out with my family here, especially my niece. She and I hung out with my friend Halecia tonight as I was babysitting. We had a pretty good time with very few meltdowns.

Tomorrow is more PSYM early bird but first I'm gonna go eat at my fav breakfast spot in town... Breadwinners. I'm going to miss it when my brother and his wife move away later this month. Going to visit them we have to find new places to eat in and around Princeton, NJ. But I'm always up for an adventure.

So I should get some rest sometime in the near future I suppose. I'll probably have thoughts about this week at the end of it all and if I can stop doing everything else in my life and get a little down time for writing, I'll post something worthwhile hopefully.

Be Not Afraid

2007-12-19T14:20:00.000-07:00

So we are less than a week until Christmas and I still have a lot to do, but I am feeling like I am done with the work I need to do before Christmas. Yesterday I got an email from Youth Specialties that talked about youth ministry and it really was a good description of how it is. The story talked about the angels proclaiming "Be not afraid." During the Christmas story. Let me share my favorite part.

Let's be honest: working with teenagers, no matter how much you love them and are called to this ministry, is cause for fear. They're a messy lot. The work is never done. The needs are never fully met. The demands and expectations of youth ministry pull in every direction, often in opposition with one another. If you live into this calling, sooner or later, you'll get hurt; you'll get ignored; you'll be misunderstood; you'll be blamed; you'll be misrepresented; and you'll screw up.

Isn't that the truth. The work isn't done. Sure, right now I'm not doing a whole lot because I have Christmas set before I go. But as soon as I get back, I've got a lock in, another trip for work (Perkins School of Youth Ministry) then I have to be thinking about another Sr. High weekend, a Jr. High weekend, and confirmation. I've got a stack of stuff I'm taking home to be working on and looking through while I am home. The work truly is never done.

But looking into the future, I am excited. I am not afraid of all that is looming in the distance. I can't be afraid if my kids get mad at me, I just have to deal with the cards I get dealt. In some cases, ministry like this has to be focused on putting out fires sometimes. I have to be prepared, yes, but unexpected things are going to happen from time to time and I just have to take them how they go.

The email was a good reminder to me to take it all one day at a time. So from me to you, I hope that you take the time this season to be not afraid. It is well worth it.

Feed the Need

2007-12-10T13:32:00.000-07:00

Each year, the youth groups of the city put on a homeless feeding program at a downtown church the 2nd Sunday of December. Last year we served 180 guests, and had about 180 volunteers. We felt like that was pretty much the cap for what we could do.

Then yesterday happened. We had over 300 volunteers, and served 366 guests. It was both heart warming to be in service, and heart breaking that there were so many there that had to be served.
The youth directors will debrief on Wednesday but there are certainly going to have to be some changes if we keep expanding.

Now only a few major projects before Christmas! It is certainly trying really hard to sneak up on me!

my advice on the Golden Compass

2007-12-10T13:24:00.000-07:00

So I had a comment on my last post, a woman asking me if it is appropriate for her 10 & 11 year old to see the movie or read the books.

Me personally, if I had kids, I wouldn't worry so much about it. But that is because I read all the books and saw the movie on Friday. I think that a lot of the discussions surrounding the book do need to happen with adults. Discussions about the church abusing power through centuries, discussions about how we put God in a box and forget that God is in everything.

So... here's my advice. Read the books, see the movie, then make an informed decision.

In the meantime, check out these interviews with Philip Pullman on beliefnet. I think they say a lot about Pullman's intentions, and really opened my eyes to even more of the theology that weaves its way through the books. Fascinating stuff really...

Why I'm not afraid of the Golden Compass...

2007-12-05T15:25:00.000-07:00

I finished the third book in the His Dark Materials series last night. As I finished, it was somewhat bittersweet as I had to leave the characters behind, much like finishing the final Harry Potter book. I'll try not to spoil too much, but be aware that if you read this post I might let some of the plot slip out.

Last night as I sat for a few minutes after I finished the book, I was really struck by the reality of our world weaved into a story of infinite worlds. I was struck by a sense of love and compassion that was found when ordinary children had a chance to do extraordinary things.

Maybe for Christians who see things as black or white, (we all have issues that we can only see right or wrong) this is a difficult story. One where the followers of the religion really mess with reality. One where "God" (who really isn't at all like our God) is put in a box to rot so that the followers can carry out their own maniacal plans.

As I was reading the end of the last book, I had one quote repeating over and over and over in my mind from Rob Bell. "What if it isn't that the story of creation happened, but that it happens..." Through a fanciful tale that had its dark moments, I feel somehow closer to understanding the divine and how the divine works within me. I am wanting to seek to be in constant communication with my soul. I want to discover the parts of me that produce goodness, courage, tenacity, overcoming adversity...

So really, I am not afraid of the Golden Compass. I think it is a shame that Christians are jumping on the bandwagon. Most I know that are planning to boycott haven't even given the books a look. I am always seeking to know more, to open my eyes to new ways to see and understand God. And I know, that last night as I finished and really felt that I was beginning to know that the story creation happens, that I am a better person for having read the series.

God doesn't ask us to do things that are easy for us. God asks us to step out in faith, not fear, and get the work done. I saw that story throughout the tale of this novel, and I am compelled to understand more, to work harder, and to really pay attention to where God is in the midst of it all.

So maybe I won't take my youth as a group to the movie, but I'll be there just after 12 this Friday to see what Hollywood has done with this world of the Golden Compass, I just hope it lives up to a sliver of the imaginary worlds that I've been living in through reading the books. I'm ready to answer questions, to ask some hard ones, and to really dive in to challenging my youth to be ok with things that other Christians may not be. Call me crazy, but I think God gave us brains for a reason...

what i've been doing lately...

2007-12-03T15:02:00.000-07:00

So each Monday for the last two weeks and the next two, I am doing a complete overhaul on my office. As any youth director knows, it is really easy to accumulate stuff. Curriculum, random things that youth give you, cds, videos, props for games, etc.

I have decided that it is really important for someone to go through the youth office oh say... once every 10 years. So I'm doing it. I tried to take a picture, but my battery on my camera just died, but I am halfway through the shelfs. I've given a lot of random things to other people in the office, I've got a box of books I'll never ever use, I have sections of books on the shelves now (Sunday night shelf, confirmation, videos, bible studies, etc.) I'm halfway done, and the half that is left looks like a bomb hit it, but I think a lot of it will be pretty easy to sort through.

Other things... enjoying www.quarterlife.com and can't wait til it is on NBC. Awesome for an online video thing to end up getting picked up by a major network.

Rose bowl! Illinois is going. If I weren't a poor youth director, I would SO be there. That would be awesome. You better believe I'll be watching that game and wearing orange on New Years Day.

Feed the Need is this weekend. I'll have about 20 kids with 200 other youth and youth directors from ABQ all helping to serve the homeless downtown. It will be a crazy but awesome experience like it always is.

I'm almost done with the His Dark Materials series. I will finish it and see the Golden Compass this weekend so that I can be informed about it when parents and other church folk ask me what all the hub bub is about. I'll likely have a post about that when I finish it up. I'm quite fascinated really, but for reasons relating to my knowledge of early Christian thought... I can't wait to finish this final book.

Ok time to get back to work... planning Bible studies and confirmation, oh joy!

apparently this is birthday weekend

2007-11-25T15:52:00.000-07:00

So far I've celebrated my birthday every day since yesterday. My birthday is actually tomorrow, so that seems to be a bonus.

Yesterday I was in Dallas still with my family and we went out to a Mexican restaurant I like there for lunch. We tried to go get cupcakes so I would have cake and could at least blow out a candle, but the cupcake place was closed sadly enough. Oh well.

This morning I got in to work rather flustered. I get in at 7:30 which is pretty darn early, but there is lots to do on a Sunday morning during this busy raise money for Costa Rica season. I was actually the only person here besides the custodian for a solid 10 minutes. There were burritos to warm up and brewing of coffee that needed to happen. So as I was making the first pot of decaf, suddenly there is a large group of teenagers standing behind me. I was about ready to tell them to go find some jobs to do when they began singing Happy Birthday to me at about 8:30 this morning. That definitely lightened my mood some.

So tomorrow is actually my birthday, and really it will be mostly like any other Monday. I've still got lots of work to do so I'll be in the office most of the day. I have a lunch meeting about confirmation class to do as well, but it is with fun people so that is good. Then some friends are taking me out to dinner that evening. All around it should be good. I just hope I get some cake at some point. Or ice cream. Or the best of both worlds... ice cream cake. I'm making my mouth water just thinking about it.

So I'm having a birthday weekend, can't complain about that one bit.

Back from camp

2007-11-19T11:51:00.000-07:00

11 youth and 2 adults.
10 hours in the car in 48 hours.
10 hours of sleep over the course of the weekend.
18 hours of all sorts of fun.
That's what CCYM camp weekends are all about.

We took our biggest group in the last 3 years to Sr. High camp this past weekend. I was joined by our senior pastor's wife as our other adult, and we headed down to Sacramento Methodist Assembly just outside of Cloudcroft, NM. It was an awesome weekend. I seriously love spending time with my youth, and this is certainly a great way to do so.

Here is my super cool senior high before we left.

This is me... on Saturday night. A kid took my camera. I generally make faces at the camera. This was a new one, though the youth that took my camera says that I give him this look all of the time...

This is Saturday night during an activity called "Peter's Walk." This is recreating Peter's walking on water activity.

This is Saby. He and his sister hung out with me all during Annual Conference in 2006. It was during that experience with them that I remembered what it is like to hang out with youth and started to feel the tug back towards youth ministry. Saby called me two weeks ago and asked me to be an adult for his small group. I said yes and we had a great time. I've already agreed to be his adult for the February event as well because he is just that awesome.

So I had a great time this past weekend and now I'm headed to see family for Thanksgiving! Woo hoo!

cracking up about my youth...

2007-11-15T19:11:00.000-07:00

So I didn't have very many guy friends when I was in high school. I had a few, but not the kind that opened up about what they were thinking very often, and definitely not like the guys I have in my youth group currently.

I'm seriously cracking up still about some of the conversations I had with some of the guys today. As I sit at coffee, I generally have time during the 2 hours where it is just me and a bunch of guys, which I think is awesome. We talk about anything and everything that guys in junior high and high school talk about which is pretty cool too. I love that they trust me enough to talk about bodily functions...

So I love hanging out with them because I really gain insight into the teenage male mind. Today's conversations seemed to center around girls. So here was the conversation that I just lost it over... I'm seriously still laughing.

S: I need a new girlfriend.
L: As in you want to take your current one in and trade it for a new model? (He said it like he was going to go get a new car or something.)
S: No, I don't have one, that's the problem. I need a new one.
L: Well I'm glad you're not shopping for one like a car.
S: Well sometimes I go looking for them in stores.
L: What?
S: Well you really don't want to date someone you meet at Wal-mart. You never know what you might get. But Macy's girls are a good call.
L: Are you serious?
S: Yeah.
L: *Face palm*
S: But I have three options right now. I have a decent chance with all of them. (He proceeded to name them and tell me a bit about all of them.)
L: So how do you decide?
S: Whichever one will go out with me first.
L: Are you serious?
S: Yeah, why not?
L: *Face palm* Well I guess that's a good way of picking a girlfriend...

So there you have it. A look into the mind of a teenage boy from my perspective. Good thing when I go to camp this weekend I am taking 8 girls and 3 boys. The girls... I get them most of the time. The boys... well I seem to smack my forehead an awful lot, but I love them. And am really intrigued about figuring out what is going on in their heads. No amount of schooling can prepare you for conversations like that one.

collective sadness

2007-11-13T15:03:00.000-07:00

There has been a strange vibe at the church this week that I describe as "Collective sadness." In the past week, 4 church members have passed away, 2 of whom I knew fairly well. So I've had 2 funerals to attend this week, one was yesterday and one is tomorrow, but it certainly hasn't been easy. There is just this sense of sadness throughout the office, and throughout the church this past Sunday.

Death really is never very easy. But it seems like an exceptional blow that so many have happened this week. As we're heading into the holidays it isn't terribly surprising, but that doesn't make it easier.

The children's ministry director and I had a discussion yesterday on how we weren't sure about the theology that God takes people to him when he decides he needs them. That part of us agrees, and part does not. But in the end, poems and stories that use that sort of theology serve to give comfort, and that is why they are needed.

I am glad that at the end of the week I get to go down to camp with my youth. It takes away from the sadness that has been felt this week. Then I get to go visit family for the holiday and then come back just in time to turn a quarter of a century. November will be over before I know it... and then Advent!!

why i love my alma mater...

2007-11-08T23:36:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I do love the Alma Mater statue outside of Altgeld hall... but really, this love comes from seeing stories about the University of Illinois.

http://www.writingwithvideo.net/

Is this not the coolest concept of a class? Oh to get my art requirement out of the way with that one would have been profoundly amazing. Instead I took art history, and don't get me wrong, I love that I can tell you names of painters and sculptors and paintings and even what era they are from and art museums actually make me really excited... but seriously, that sounds like the coolest class ever. And a comp II??? Ok so maybe I took about 6 classes that took care of that requirement, but still.

I don't miss college much... but sometimes I miss the challenges of having thinking exercises day in and day out. I don't miss having to read 300 pages a night and the late nights writing 20 page papers. There is just something about school to me though that gets my blood pumping in a way that a normal job can't... but that doesn't mean I'm going back anytime soon.

office hours bring entertainment

2007-11-08T21:30:00.001-07:00

So I had 6 youth and another adult sponsor show up to hang out with me at the coffee shop today which was fun. I really enjoy just spending time with the youth that show up.

They for some reason wanted to show me youtube videos today, but the internet at the coffeeshop wasn't working so i wrote down what to look up and did so just a few minutes ago.

So I looked them up... and my youth crack me up. And there are some weird people on youtube.

If you're interested, just check out videos called: bohemian acid, my hands are bananas, and barney versus spongebob

I was thinking about the appeal of such ridiculous videos... for me, I think that even though these videos are ridiculous, they say something about creativity among this culture we now live in. My youth are making up songs all of the time, and they have the ability to express themselves through different media. I hear a lot of adults complaining about what media is doing to kids, and sure, some of this stuff is incredibly mindless, but taking the time to do this shows drive and creativity in my book.

I'll probably be thinking more about this, but I have some stuff to get done and a very full weekend ahead of me. But I love Thursday afternoons. It means that the week is over and I get to spend 2 hours just hanging out with my youth which is awesome.

do not fear...

2007-11-01T21:23:00.000-06:00

Here's my life lesson for November... coming up with these monthly is a lot harder than it should be, but when all is said and done, my youth seem to appreciate a glimpse into my life and what I think about faith so I'm glad to take some time to come up with something each month.

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. – Isaiah 41:10

So maybe it isn’t on the same level as Israel being delivered from the tyranny of other countries, but I spent the entire night of October 26th in fear. I was with the young adult group from Central out at McCall’s haunted corn maze, and with every turn, I closed my eyes and hoped that nothing would jump out at me.

As I walked through the maze and was greeted by ghouls, goblins, clowns and other assorted scary things, I couldn’t help but jump at every turn. Even being surrounded by friends, I barely had it in me to complete the maze, but once I had made the commitment to enter into the maze, there was no turning back.

For me, often faith is a lot like that maze. Once you enter, there is no turning back. You are surrounded by your friends, and are unsure of where you are going and what you might run into, but something pushes you to go further. At some points you feel lost and might even regret entering the maze, but at the end of it all, you’re thankful for the experience.

Fortunately for all of us, entering into the journey of faith isn’t a guarantee of fright as the “Field of Screams,” was. In choosing a life devoted to Christ, we are assured that we are not alone and God is with us every step of the way. The next time that you are frightened on the journey, rest assured that Jesus is with you, you are not alone, and God is always there to strengthen you and carry you on the journey.

As for me, I won’t be entering a haunted corn maze again any time soon, but I excited about walking on this journey of faith with all of you.

one more picture...

2007-10-29T14:55:00.001-06:00

I thought I would throw a picture up that showed me, late in the night, discussing things with Sherri, who is one of the most amazing youth sponsors ever, and with Eddie who I used to work with at Saranam. Eddie's costumes are always ridiculous...

But this also shows me in my "costume." In my crazy busy weekend, I never got a chance to get something more interesting, but I wore what I wore for an entire summer in the mountains of Tennessee...

success!!!

2007-10-28T21:52:00.000-06:00

The big event for the youth group is now over. We've spent the last month preparing for an awesome event. At the height of it all tonight, we counted roughly 200 people. I would say we probably had about 225 people for the whole event. Here are some shots that I got tonight...

This is my friend. His name is... Aragog.

One of my adult sponsors made a coffin. The youth want me to put it in the youth lounge now. I don't quite know what to do with it, but I think storage...

The cars bounce house was a spectacular hit.

This shot was taken just after we counted 200 people. It was more than awesome.

And now I am glad it is over and I am going to sleep. For a long time.

just chilling at a coffee shop

2007-10-25T16:00:00.000-06:00

I have very little time to think let alone think enough to write these days. But today is quiet at the coffee shop as my youth who come normally are all busy and can't make it today. No matter though, I still come, and get some work done.

Sunday is our big carnival at the church. I've spent the month thinking about it, I even dreamt about it last night. I dreamt that there was no candy to hand out to the little kids which was quite the bummer. So of course I sent a reminder email to my youth to bring candy on Sunday. We do a TON of work to get this whole event planned and prepared. I'll be busy all day Saturday and Sunday for sure. I can't wait until the weekend is over.

My junior high youth are in charge of the games. It makes for an interesting time for sure. Then the senior high puts together a "haunted" area and this year will be a pirate ship. Of course they decided to go and be completely and totally elaborate. But it should be really cool. One of my adults built a coffin for us to use and that will be beyond cool. I can't wait to see it because he's really put a lot of effort and work into it.

I will hopefully get some great pictures of what they come up with.

I started to plan into 2008 today because I was feeling ok with Sunday's plans. I might regret that, but it is good to get a start on next year. Before I know it, it will be summer and I'll be headed to Costa Rica with the youth and families of the church.

Almost every day I have a point where I realize that the way things have turned out have really been nothing short of perfect. I have awesome students who are really eager to be helpful and to learn. I am definitely blessed by the position I'm in.

I finally finished Contemplative Youth Ministry, and there was a section that really struck me hard about why those who are called into youth ministry sometimes end up there. For youth ministers to relate to their students on a level that they need, often the youth minister needs to come to a level that is open and honest and seeking to be with Jesus. For many of the youth ministers I know, this is the only way that they can truly seek to be a follower of Christ. In other situations they are tough, seem like they have it all together and are "super" Christians. When they are with their youth, another story develops. It is one of compassion and yearning to be open and honest. It is one of vulnerability. It is one of seeking to be with the youth and present with them in such a way that it in turn changes the soul of the youth director.

I was struck by this notion and can see that within me for sure. When I am with my youth, I am alive, I am vulnerable, and I am seeking to not only teach them about Jesus by trying to be an example of Christ, but I am trying to reflect the Christ that I see in them right back at them. That is the part of my job that I love. Those brief yet precious moments of seeing a youth realize that Christ is within them and alive. Those moments makes the stress in my life worth it.

proof i love my job

2007-10-18T18:19:00.000-06:00

On Thursday afternoons, I head out of the office (more like run trying to get out on time) and go to a local coffee shop. I meet up with youth to hang out. Today there were 4 of us total, and we had a great time with conversation. One of them did homework, one played a game with me (flicking a quarter back and forth across the table trying to score a goal by coming close to the edge without going off) and the other was her normal self and chatted away. It was awesome.

Towards the end we were all playing with cell phones and the youth across the table from me snapped this shot. I think it is proof that I love my job.

Been awhile

2007-10-17T21:45:00.000-06:00

A lot has come and gone in the last few weeks including the balloon fiesta (I didn't go to a mass ascension nor take any pictures, sad) a visit from my parents and a whole lot of work. I also bought a new car which has been a grand addition to my life as my old one was starting to make me mad every time I drove it and really wasn't worth sinking a whole lot of money into.

I wanted to go back and hit a bit of what I learned on the youth director retreat, mainly because I'm avoiding doing a report I actually have to do for tomorrow.

If you want to read any more on the subject of Contemplative Youth ministry, I highly suggest Yaconelli's book called Contemplative Youth Ministry. I'm about halfway through and am learning a lot more than he shared over the weekend, and thankfully I also will get to hear him speak at the beginning of January at the Perkins School of Youth Ministry event that I plan on going to.

So... the basic premise is that youth ministry is based out of anxiety, in fact a lot of ministry is based out of anxiety. This does not make for good ministry. Good ministry is based out of love. In anxiety based ministry you need to have these things to survive: solid products, professional experts to tell answers, activity based programs, conformity and predictability, & control.

As one might expect, youth don't really latch onto that model. Just hearing it myself being a young person, I want nothing to do with it...

So imagine this, a ministry based out of love involves presence. The act of being present with someone. Whether it is talking to a youth about homecoming, or a sport they are playing, or just what is going on in their life. It is a process. You can't expect to just get right to the answer. Youth may not get it right away, but they will understand better if you go through the process. Explain the what and the whys (an old Mountain TOP trick of the trade). It is creativity and inspiration. You can't just use cookie cutter programs and expect that youth will just get it. I might use books for a basic idea, but I revamp and rework it, pray about it, and sometimes whatever happens at youth isn't what I intended. That is creativity and divine inspiration.
Contemplation. Being intentional about everything that happens is an important piece of this ministry.

The word anxiety comes from a word that means "to choke." That doesn't exactly make me excited about ministry, and unfortunately that is what happens with a lot of ministry. Talk to any pastor or person involved in the ministry, and they can probably tell countless stories of this anxiety based ministry. I know that the college ministry that I worked at really was working hard when I left to get out of ministry based in anxiety. The first couple of years there were just miserable under the leadership's constant fear of rejection by the students. As our leadership changed, it took some time to get the fear and anxiety out of the college students who had been disappointed for so long. Last I heard, the ministry is really getting to be a healthy thing on campus, and is whether they know it or not, I think is moving toward a ministry based out of love.

Above all, this ministry based in love is rooted in the presence of God being in the center of everything. Reshaping the way that meetings happen. Reshaping the way that we spend time with and look at youth. Last week I started a new program for our youth. Don't tell the management... but it isn't a program. It is hanging out. On Thursdays, which to me are the end of my work week as I (try to) take Friday and Saturday off, I spend 2 hours hanging out at a local coffee shop with some youth. The youth are free to come and go as they please, there is no agenda, no Bible study, no plan. We just sit around and chat. That was truly the highlight of my work week last week because as I sat around in a circle with these youth, I knew that they felt like they mattered. To each other as well as to the adults that stopped by. It was a blessing to get to spend some time with these awesome young people outside of who they think they have to be at church and just relax and goof off. It really was a great way to head into the weekend.

So, if you are in ministry, I challenge you to evaluate how you look at ministry. Is it anxiety based? If so... get out. Change it. Read the book by Yaconelli and figure out how to make it different.

If your ministry is based in love, you'll know it. And we can't be perfect all of the time, and there are moments when we all resort to using canned programs and wanting to have all the right answers.

When I was in training to work for Mountain TOP, we watched a leadership video that to this day has stuck with me. Each day we have a choice to agree to do 4 things in our jobs or leadership positions to make it worthwhile. Those things are to play, make their day, choose your attitude, and be there. I see these 4 choices at the core of the ministry based out of love. If I wake up each morning and think through these things, I think I'll be on the right track.

one of the top ten

2007-09-30T23:38:00.000-06:00

Here's one of the top ten reasons I love my job....

We were doing a popcorn prayer about what we were thankful for tonight with just the mid high group.

There were normal things like friends, family, and youth group.

But then there was applesauce, Los Lunas (a town nearby) and Republicans.

Only with my job. Really.

Laura's life lessons

2007-09-27T14:47:00.000-06:00

Each month I send out a newsletter to my youth and include a section where I get to share something I've learned that month. The point is to understand that we are always still learning and *gasp* adults make mistakes, learn things, and aren't perfect. I'll start sharing those here.

I have some posts to come about my weekend learning from Yaconelli as well. I just keep forgetting to bring my notebook to work and I haven't been home much earlier than 11 pm every night this week. I just got my copies of Contemplative Youth Ministry and Growing Souls so I'll be diving into those this weekend too.

Without further ado... here's what I was thinking about today and am sharing with my youth in this upcoming newsletter...

“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” -1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

It was the first night of the youth worker retreat, and there I sat, trying to pray and I kept getting distracted. Our worship gatherings over the weekend together were filled with prayer. They were filled with petitions and intercession. They were filled with praying through the scriptures and praying for students, and praying for the church worldwide and for countless other things. As we sat and prayed, I had no idea how hard those minutes were going to be. I thought to myself, “This should be easy, I just spent weeks working on programs for youth that were focused on prayer.”

As the weekend went on, during each worship gathering the prayer time became easier. By Sunday morning, I was feeling anxious about heading home and not having this intentional prayer time each day for me to sort through my thoughts and just be given permission to pray and be still in God’s presence.

Sometimes in our hyperactive culture, we don’t take the time to slow down and pray for the situations we’re in and the people that surround us. I often take time to have a conversation with God as I drive, or when I’m standing in line at the grocery store, but I struggle to find quiet time for just me and God with no distraction. This past weekend, I learned I needed that time more than any other in my day.

I encourage you to find the time in your day to just sit and be with God. Sometimes it can be hard when other things flood our minds, but I guarantee that your day will be better and your soul will be more whole when you take the time to retreat and be in the presence of the Holy One. God has been, is and always will be speaking if we just stop and take the time to be in the Holy Presence of the Spirit.

mandatory retreating...

2007-09-21T17:10:00.000-06:00

God is good. And I think that everyone should take a mandatory retreat. Not that this one is mandatory, but it definitely probably should have been for me.

Today so far we've had some prayer time this morning praying through Romans 6, we've been just gathering together to talk and laugh, and laugh a ton more, and then this afternoon a handful of us went golfing. And it was way an awesome experience. We played best ball which was good because all of us hadn't played much lately and were sharing clubs. It was definitely a good time though and I'm hoping to get some more golf time in during the future.

Tonight our speaker gets in and we will worship together which should be good. There is just something about being on retreat in these mountains. Definitely a good way to sort of mark being in this job for 3 months.

make the journey part of the retreat...

2007-09-20T21:39:00.000-06:00

I'm currently on retreat with 14 of the coolest youth pastors I know. Tomorrow we get to hear from Mark Yaconelli and I am certain that insights will be gained in abundance, but today has been the day to begin the retreat.

Yesterday, my friend Christy and her mom told me that I needed to make the journey part of the retreat. My weariness has started to really show through, so the journey needed to be part of the recovery process for me. Little did I know I definitely was in for retreat from life as I know it the minute we hit the road.

Five of us took off together (it was supposed to be six but one was sick and couldn't make it) and headed our way south. We took our time this morning getting out of the city, getting some breakfast, some snacks, and the itrip for the ipods.

We traveled and stopped in Tularosa for lunch and laughed and discussed and began this process of being away from our lives and our jobs. I turned my phone off shortly after leaving the city, and won't turn it back on until Sunday. That is a good feeling.

We stopped again to pick up some pistachios, then again at the old apple barn. By the time we had that stop we were all cracking each other up and I brought up the idea of making the journey part of the retreat. We all agreed that we had done nothing short of that, and that we were all already feeling a lot better than the day before.

Now I'm just going to try to really live in the moment down here, enjoy the torrential downpours of rain, and be at peace with myself and my surroundings. That is something that I find extremely difficult to do most of the time, but I'm trying to let go and let God do some things in my heart and mind this weekend. Hopefully that will happen.

on singles ministry... and why i think it is bad...

2007-09-19T14:07:00.000-06:00

Over the past few weeks I have gotten a handful of inquiries about starting a singles ministry at the church.

I am the youth director. Just because I am the only single person on staff should not mean that I am obligated to create some place for singles to meet and hang out. Besides the fact that they are wholly ineffective and usually just turn into youth groups for adults. By which I mean, everyone dates everyone else to get out of their singleness, and then they get mad at each other and then there is weird awkward tension in the group. Of course it is different than in youth groups because for the most part, youth get over it. Which I am thankful for.

I might have had a stern interaction with a volunteer who immediately assumed that a phone call about singles ministry should go straight to me. Which was slightly ridiculous of me, but I also think that it is really ridiculous of people to assume that I'll start one. My job title is director of youth ministries. Though I'm doing some young adult stuff too, nowhere does it say that I do adult ministries or singles ministries.

Just something that got my goat this week. So I don't plan on catering to things that people want me to do, and number one on the list is singles ministries. I've never seen one that isn't filled with middle aged people or that is effective. I'm all for the social principles affirming single persons, don't get me wrong at all, I just think affirming them is hanging out with people who are single, married, in a committed relationship, or whatever. To be honest, most of my friends in my life right now are not single, and I am completely fine with not having to deal with the drama of single friends dating and being all confused about it and asking for advice. I don't have the time to date right now let alone start some singles ministry.

End soap box.

I'm off to a youth worker retreat this weekend and I am beyond excited about it. But I still have a lot to get done in the next 20 minutes, so back to the grindstone!

playing the link game...

2007-09-17T19:19:00.000-06:00

My friend Ben wrote an article about the conference I went to way back in May and it is up on the umc.org website here.

I have a handful of friends in seminary to become pastors in the United Methodist Church, and a large amount of people I know who have thought about seminary and going into parish ministry, but the process is antiquated and doesn't seem to help those who are pursuing a calling.

A huge part of why I'm not in seminary right now is that the candidacy process isn't terribly appealing to me at the moment. For someone who at least for a time feels called to youth ministry, I feel like I am serving better in my current capacity than I would be if I ran off to seminary and ended up doing youth ministry and trying to be an associate pastor at the same time.

So many young clergy are forced into doing things that they aren't passionate about, and this is after they've been completely torn to shreds by the Board of Ordained Ministry. I was taught early on that if I wanted to go into ministry to work on becoming friends with people on the Board of Ordained Ministry. It is almost a good ole boys concept still which really really irritates me.

There are reasons that I will have to jump through hoops one day. Pastors in the UM tradition are basically guaranteed a job once they get out of the probationary period (don't get me started on how I think the word "probationary" is bad).

In any case... Ben did an awesome job of summing up the event, so go check it out.... Coming up next here, probably tomorrow... a discourse on why I hate the term "singles ministry" and why I am frustrated with the thought of it.

new digs...

2007-09-15T15:15:00.000-06:00

So here are some interior shots of the apartment. I'm loving it. Seriously.

My friend Tara helped me with color scheme, and she was awesome at it. My bedroom is probably close to my favorite...

But really, who couldn't love the fireplace in the living room?

My kitchen is fantastic. I mean really, I couldn't ask for much more.

sometimes my life is kind of strange

2007-09-14T00:17:00.000-06:00

I finally got my internet up and running. I swear if I weren't a super sleuth who spent way too much time learning about computers I would spend a lot of time not knowing how to do stuff. Of course getting the internet up and running took longer than normal, but my service provider is getting sneaky about letting people use modems that they don't sell you. Needless to say, I have internet and am using the modem that has the wireless built in. Only took me a couple of hours of scratching my brain though. Tricky people and their hidden PPP login info...

Tonight I attended my very first rodeo. A friend had some extra tickets and invited me and I actually ended up inviting 2 other friends to come along. All 3 of them didn't even know each other at all. But we had a really great time and I was really pleased with how we all got along. Definitely very cool.

After the rodeo, some country singer took the stage. I definitely let it be known that I don't care for country, but I was having some fun with some people I don't get to hang out with much, so I decided to not be a complete loser and stuck around with them.

Contrary to what the 3 of them decided, I'm not leaving my music behind for country. But all in all it was an enjoyable experience. Especially when the guy played a little Johnny Cash... you can't go wrong with him...

Here is a video... we'll see if the new blogger feature really works.

a rut in the day...

2007-09-11T16:25:00.000-06:00

I always hit a block at about 3:30 each day at work. Sometimes I can fix it with a diet coke, but I've really been trying to keep my caffeine intake to a minimum so I've been trying to find other ways to get through the block. I haven't succeeded much this week due to a head cold that I'm battling, but most weeks I get through it and get a lot done from about 4-6.

One of the awesome parts of my job is just hanging out with teenagers. And with the extreme busy schedules they all have, this has proved to be pretty difficult, but not impossible.

One of the super cool things about living in the era I do and working with post-modern youth is that I can check up on them pretty easily. With social networking tools, through im and text messaging, it takes just a few seconds for me to see how my youth are doing and see if they need anything from me whether it is an ear to listen, advice, or someone who gives them a good laugh.
I know a lot of people who don't really consider all of those forms of communication true communication. I wholeheartedly disagree. Sure, meeting in person is always my preferred way to see how my youth are doing, but sometimes there just isn't time for it as they run from school to sports and have mounds of homework. So I do what I can with what I've got so far. And so far it seems to be working, so no complaints here.

So the thing that has been getting me out of my rut lately is that as the youth come home from school, I usually have a few that check in with me anywhere from 4-6. And suddenly I'm getting work done, I'm doing some counseling, I'm just listening, and the rut of the day disappears. I love how God takes care of stuff like that. When I get discouraged, suddenly I am presented with an opportunity to be in relationship with awesome teenagers. It makes my day. Seriously.

all sorts of busy stuff

2007-09-10T16:44:00.001-06:00

Let's go through a run through of a typical week, shall we?

Sunday - Work from 8-8 This varies but is usually just about that time frame. I enjoy it, but it certainly takes a lot out of me. Last night I started up a new young adult group. There were 4 of us there, but we have more prospects. I think this is awesome, but it totally extends my Sunday nights almost beyond what I want. It was a night that worked for people though so we will see where it goes.

Monday- Roll into work at about 9:30. Start working on stuff for the next Sunday, deal with anything bad that happened Sunday night. Bring volunteers up to speed with where we're going. I have the tendency to work through lunch on Mondays. This is probably not a good thing. I stay til at least 5 and head over to Bible Study sometime after that. Bible study is at 6, and we usually run til about 9.

Tuesdays- Get in to work, do a bit before staff meeting. Staff meeting and usually lunch with staff. Tuesday afternoons I really start to put legs on whatever program we're doing on Sundays. Tuesday nights are relatively calm usually, with a meeting once a month, but not much else.

Wednesday- Morning Bible Study and lunch with the women of the word Bible study. I am blessed to be the youngest in the group, and have gained much wisdom from those who have walked before me. Seriously, I love this group. Wednesday I keep chugging on youth stuff and try to get done for Sunday but it doesn't always happen. Wed night starting next week- Bible study at 5:30-7 and then book study at 7. This is nuts. Really.

Thursday- I try to get ahead. It doesn't always work. But really, this is the day I set aside for spending time coming up with ideas, doing a little reading, or figuring out the craziness that is my office.

Fridays- My one day off that I try to hold REALLY sacred. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

Saturdays - Counterculture stuff from 3:30- whenever I get home late at night. I usually have some last minute stuff to get done for Sunday. But I try really hard not to. As far as a Sabbath goes, I try to make Saturday it. Worshipping, praising, taking care of my soul.

Of course none of this counts any of the random crazy meetings that spring up. Or when my kids need someone to talk to at 8 pm. Or when I have special events. Or hanging out with youth at sports games etc. Or when I feel like maybe I need to hang out with friends.

I'm maybe in too many studies, but right now I don't feel too overwhelmed with them. I think I'm gaining insight in all of them. In some of them I sit there learning, and in others I am the one that is teaching others the things I've already worked through. I'm glad I'm still learning though, we'll see how the fall goes with all this stuff I'm starting up. I of course have a whole different list of things I would like to start with the youth and young adults here. And it is killing me that I don't feel like I'm doing a heck of a lot of service in the community right now, but perhaps after leaving my last job, I might need a little break from it.

Welcome home...

2007-08-31T19:32:00.001-06:00

This is my new apartment. I got the keys today and will be moving in slowly but surely over the next week. I am beyond excited because this is really the first place that I have had to seek out and work hard to get. When I moved down here, Tracy picked out my apartment which was awesome because I didn't know anything about the city. For me, that always seemed temporary especially because I really felt like I wouldn't stay here for more than my two years.

I plan on making this one feel a lot more like home. I've already put curtains up and have bought some things to decorate with which will be good. I plan on slowly replacing my furniture because I still have a lot of mismatched stuff that doesn't really go together at all.

I think I will feel completely better about it when I get settled in, but for the most part I am excited about living close to friends, in a residential area, in a pretty cool apartment.

It is good to have this part be almost over...

teaching experientially...

2007-08-28T13:32:00.000-06:00

I know my cultural and historical Bible info fairly well and can lead a pretty good Bible study when I have the opportunity to. Right now I'm leading my youth through John, and I want ways to spice it up and do some experiential things. A lot of Bible Studies I have found for youth just take pieces of the Bible and pull things out of it in order to prove a point rather than let the text lead the discussion and that is what my kids want. They haven't had a whole lot of interaction with the Bible as a story, so that's what we're working on. I think one of the things that is wrong with Sunday School in general is that we have the tendency to dumb it down so that kids get it. By the time kids get to youth group they don't know how to think critically about what they are reading. So that's what I'm working towards. Anyone have any ideas, specifically with the book of John?

I'm hopefully getting to a point where I can really start working on visioning for the youth. It excites me because I am completely a big picture person and jumping in and having to deal with the week to week stuff utterly exhausted me. Besides the fact that I just am overly busy.

I completely just got frightened by one of our pastors who came in my office and laughed maniacally. Not cool. Completely derailed my thought process.

Off to go work on stuff for Bible study tomorrow morning. I think I might be in too many Bible studies.

a prayer

2007-08-25T16:34:00.000-06:00

I have a favorite prayer I turn to when my life is a little more busy than I would like it to be. All of the frantic pace of my life seems to be catching up to me but hopefully I'll be able to slow down a little bit soon. For now, here is the prayer

"A Busy Frantic Life"
by Teresa of Avila

How is it, my God, that you have given me this hectic busy life when I have so little time to enjoy your presence. Throughout the day people are waiting to speak with me, and even at meals I have to continue talking to people about their needs and problems. During sleep itself I am still thinking and dreaming about the multitude of concerns that surround me. I do all this not for my own sake, but for yours. To me my present pattern of life is a torment; I only hope that for you it is truly a sacrifice of love. I know that you are constantly beside me, yet I am usually so busy that I ignore you. If you want me to remain so busy, please force me to think about and love you even in the midst of such hectic activity. If you do not want me so busy, please release me from it, showing how others can take over my responsibilities.

wow what a week

2007-08-24T15:14:00.000-06:00

Earlier this week I was preparing to move my stuff out of my apartment and didn't have anywhere lined up to live. I was anxious about an apartment but hadn't seen it and kept getting the runaround about it. I'm always very planned about big stuff like this, but it seemed like no matter what I did I kept ending up back at square one.

On Tuesday I was finally able to see the apartment I've had my eye on since the beginning of the month, and on Thursday I signed a lease. I'm still within about 5 minutes of the church by car which is a good distance. There are perks to living across the street, but now I will be able to separate home from work with more distinguishable boundaries. It is also a bonus that I will be living within walking distance from some great friends.

I am still moving everything out this weekend because I can't handle the stress of turning over an apartment within a day. My new lease starts the day that my old lease ends.

Moving is one of those things that I really dread for the most part. I think that I am just a creature of habit and really work hard to have my life follow patterns. That always makes transitions a little rocky. Thankfully though, I have friends who are seriously amazing and are letting me store stuff at their houses, are helping me to move stuff and are letting me stay with them for a week. So a big thanks to Billy, Tara, Whitney, Jarrod, Alex, Leah, Parker and Halecia. My friends here are seriously amazing and I am thankful that I am staying in Albuquerque and get to continue to have some really great friends!

moving and other things.

2007-08-19T14:33:00.000-06:00

Ok, I found this funny.... and can't help but post it.

Hat tip to Gavin for that one...

Now that you've watched that...

My life is crazy busy, but fun. I'm in the midst of moving all of my stuff to a friend's house, I'll be staying with some other friends starting Saturday if I still don't have a place to live, but hopefully I'll have somewhere to move into this week or at the latest by Sept. 1. Right now I am so thankful I have friends with big houses where I can store things and live for a little bit. Hopefully once I move, I'll stay put.

We've been averaging 25 kids since the end of summer at youth group. I had 8 this morning for Bible Study. That says a lot for an 8:45 study. I won't be surprised if we end up with 30 tonight. God has been blessing this ministry so much these last few weeks it is absolutely amazing. I'm ramping up the spiritual side of things next week, and I'm going to use a lot of the stuff we've been doing the last few weeks to drive the point of community and unity home.

We're moving towards a church wide family and senior high mission trip to Costa Rica at the end of May and into June. I'm beyond excited for that.

I've been battling a cold this week, but I'm starting to feel better.

I've been trying to volunteer with Saranam as they bring in families this coming week. Things are crazy with that ministry right now, but God is truly blessing them for some amazing work to be done over the next 2 years with the new families.

This week is what I call "paperwork" week. I have a newsletter to get out to my youth, I have things that have to go in our church newsletter, I have things for our Church council report. It seems the paperwork never ends!

Now to get a bunch of it done over the next two hours or so when youth starts!

Happy Left-handers day!

2007-08-13T14:17:00.000-06:00

Today is a day to be celebrated. It is a day of celebration for people who are left-handed.

I only do one thing right handed, and that is play golf. Of course I haven't played in forever, but that's it.

People who are right handed never really get the discrimination that we left handed people face day to day. I play the guitar left handed and have to pay a premium price to get a guitar that will work for me. I have to search for a seat at a table that is on the left end so I don't elbow people. Scissors... well don't even get me started on scissors. There's no wonder we have a higher mortality rate than right handed people.

In college, my 2nd semester of Greek was strange... there were 13 of us, and 7 of the 13 people were left handed. I didn't stick around past that first month of the class, but every time we took a quiz, Sansone would comment about how many left-handers there were. We all just decided we were overly smart because we were left handed and that is why we even made it to the 2nd semester of that class.

Well, as the old joke goes, there is at least one good thing about being left handed... at least I'm in my right mind.

thinking about young adult ministry

2007-08-09T14:52:00.000-06:00

Yesterday I read an article about young adults and churches online at USA today. I was fascinated by it, and found it especially helpful as I get going in youth and young adult ministry. I definitely don't want to be leading a youth group that is just a holding tank with pizza, I want to be helping these youth find their spiritual identity amidst a world of chaos.

Earlier this afternoon I had a conversation with one of my youth who was telling me that it is hard to be a young person these days. So much to be distracted by such as the internet, cell phones, so many people expecting them to grow up without ever having chances to make mistakes, and so much more is just going on in this chaotic world. I know that I myself have gotten a lot accomplished today, and have been seriously multitasking even listening to sermons while finishing up a Bible Study and keeping my eye on apartments and making phone calls etc.

Our culture tells us today that we have to go go go. We always have to be doing something, we always have to be on the move and worst of all, it tells us that we don't need God to do all of this. We can rely on ourselves. Between the sermons I listened to and the Bible Study I finished up today I am seeing this be a recurring theme. Perhaps it is a sign for me to slow down and know that I need God through everything, not just where I call upon God but through it all.

One of the sermons I listened to today quoted this quote from George Orwell that I found especially striking.

"I thought of a rather cruel trick I once played on a wasp. He was sucking jam on my plate, and I cut him in half. He paid no attention, merely went on with his meal, while a tiny stream of jam trickled out of his severed esophagus. Only when he tried to fly away did he grasp the dreadful thing that had happened to him. It is the same with modern man. The thing that has been cut away is his soul..."

I fear that in our busy lives, in our hurried pace, this is what we are really starting to do. I don't think that it is too late yet, but I think if we don't take the charge seriously to include God in every aspect of our lives, one day we will turn around and realize that even though we are consumers eating our jam and being relatively content, our souls have been cut off.

One easy way we're doing that is that the church is not raising up leaders like it should. It isn't doing so because leadership isn't something you just tell people to do, it is something you foster and help people grow through. Like the above article stated.... "Unless religious leaders take younger adults more seriously, the future of American religion is in doubt," says Princeton sociologist Robert Wuthnow in After the Baby Boomers, due in stores in September.

Cutting off young people is just the beginning of cutting off the soul of the church and ultimately the soul of Christianity in my opinion. The statistics are truly staggering and really opened my eyes to the grave outlook that there is as far as youth and young adult ministry is concerned. Though it might be grave, I am energized by the spirit that is moving in and around what is going on here in this ministry so far.

fear factor...

2007-08-04T15:11:00.001-06:00

Tomorrow we're doing a "Fear factor" night which I have renamed "faith factor" We'll do some gross stuff then move into a discussion about faith and fear. I'm really excited about it. I need to go pick up a few more items for it, and I love that my list is this.... marshmellows, alphabet soup, sardines, knee high panty hose, and bananas. I bet the clerk at the store will look at me funny.

I've really got a solid group of youth right now which is amazing. I've spent a lot of this week touching bases with them, seeing how they are doing and being in conversation with them. That has been good because I am just a little bit stressed about my life currently. At least I'm down to one job.

This morning I did go help out with some Saranam stuff, and of course I've volunteered to do some things next Saturday and the week of moving people in. Starting yesterday, I'm being incredibly intentional about taking a sabbath day, which is Friday for me. Saturdays are also helpful to have off, but I have things I have to get done on Saturdays a lot of the time. I took care of some things yesterday, but was really intentional about not working at all and it was really a good day for me.

I need to be off to church for setup here soon, but I was just too entertained by my shopping list for tomorrow that I couldn't help but post it. It will definitely be a whole lot of fun.

Youth director at her finest...

2007-08-03T11:35:00.000-06:00

One of my youth sent this picture of me from the lock in. Good times.

transitions...

2007-08-02T15:42:00.000-06:00

So most of my fellow US-2s have started going through their transitions to the next chapter of their lives, and Tiffany just posted a quick blog about it being August already and ended it with a quote from Grey's Anatomy that is oh so true... "We're adults. When did that happen? And how do we make it stop?"

I've been a little stressed out myself even though I am not leaving here. I turned in notice to my apartment complex that I'm leaving at the end of the month, but have nowhere to move to. I feel like that might have been a bit silly, but I fear that if I don't make myself move, I won't. So I'm frantically looking for a place to live. If it doesn't happen I have amazing friends who will let me stay in their spare room for a few weeks, but I'm trying to have confidence that I will find something I like and can afford.

The transition to the new job has gone fairly smoothly. I'm really starting to get my bearings and have already seen 32 individual kids over the last week which is awesome. I only have 28 on my active list currently so to see 32 last weekend (between the lock in and youth on Sunday) was a true blessing. I'm definitely looking forward to this year and all the things that are planned and coming up.

I think that part of why I am a youth director, (and why other youth directors do what they do) is that they fear growing up. Just like I'm fearing finding some place to live on my own (this is really the first time I've had to do that as Tracy did it for me last time), I am fearing really being an adult. I'll be 25 this year, which is just unbelievable in my mind and all I have to look forward to in that regard is that my insurance is going to go down come November. Sad really.

So what is so scary about becoming an adult? I certainly don't want to go back to being a child again, or a teenager, or being in college, but this concept of completely being on my own in the world, not as some missionary or college student or high school student.... it really scares the crud out of me.

podcast!

2007-07-30T15:39:00.000-06:00

Well most of the missionary podcasts that we US-2s made when we were in NYC are up... you can check them out here!

The sad part is that I hardly remember saying any of that. Go figure.

I have 1 more day of officially being a missionary. Crazy. Right now I'm working on some follow up VBS stuff. I sat in on my last Saranam staff meeting today which hasn't really sunk in yet, but it will be good to just have one job. Of course I'll stay busy as youth ministry is definitely demanding. But I am definitely excited about it!

Feature at GBGM website

2007-07-24T09:51:00.000-06:00

Just wanted to link you all to a feature about the end of being a US-2 that a fellow classmate wrote for the GBGM website.

I'll probably have some thoughts about finishing up my time as a US-2 over the next couple of weeks, but right now I have some daunting tasks ahead of me for the day, things I really really need to get done before this weekend.

Staff meeting time!

and the craziness begins.

2007-07-23T17:41:00.000-06:00

I had a completely successful parent meeting last night which was awesome. The staff talked about the game I played with parents and kids all day today. Definitely cool, I have amazing parents to work with, and I am so ready to just be the youth director.

I also finished Harry Potter at some point on Saturday which was amazing. I did in fact wait in line on Friday night, and I was about the 6th in my line to get the book. Very exciting. Here's a picture of me just having gotten the book at about 12:15 am on Friday night.

I'm in the thick of planning a lock in for Friday night, and gearing up for back to school activities. I'm definitely ready to get into the swing of things for sure. As school gears up, we will definitely be doing some fun amazing things. I'm definitely excited for what is to come.

VBS

2007-07-20T17:03:00.000-06:00

And Vacation Bible School is over for the year amazingly enough. I was in charge of the 4th and 5th graders, who were fun up until about yesterday. All I can say is that I am wonderfully glad they have a year or two before I get them in youth group.

I'm always amazed about how much I learn from kids, and how much I learn from the curriculum that kids are given. Each day had a different theme, I will follow, I will trust, I will listen, I will repent, and I will serve. We really had a fantastic time with it all though we will all breathe a sigh of relief after Sunday is over. We lead worship on Sunday and if the practice run today is any indication, my time will be spent making sure kids aren't causing serious amounts of trouble in the choir loft.

My favorite part of the week was that each morning, our senior pastor got up to pray with the kids, and he would pray and they would repeat what he said. Hearing that chorus of small voices was the highlight of my day for sure.

Now I'm just waiting in anticipation for the much anticipated blockbuster book hit of the summer. Harry Potter. You all know what I'll be doing tomorrow.... reading!

and she's married..

2007-07-17T23:25:00.000-06:00

We're in VBS week and I'm swamped as usual but I just wanted to throw up a quick update that I was in a wedding this past weekend and it was awesome. My best friend from high school and college got married to another really good friend from high school and college. It was a great week of catching up, really getting to know the adults my friends have become, and having a great time while doing it.

Congratulations Nick and Rebecca!

From right to left: Megan, me, Rebecca, Nick, Alison.
Seattle Matt, Rebecca's friend from grade school is in the back. He's awesome too.

new devotionals...

2007-07-10T09:42:00.000-06:00

I've been struggling with finding a devotion book for me that I am really inspired by. I always spend some of my morning in prayer, but feel like I needed something more.

On Sunday night when I got out of youth group, I needed some consoling so I called my friend Leah and she met me for Boba Tea. Youth group didn't go exactly as planned but I felt better about it on Monday than I did on Sunday night when I got done. Hopefully as I find my groove I'll be more confident about the ministry that is going on.

As we were headed back to my car to sit and chat about what was frustrating about how youth group ended up, I changed my mind and asked if we could go to Hastings and find a book on youth ministry or something. Resources will fix my problem! (They won't. I just like bookstores and looking around helps my psyche.)

I stumbled upon the updated "My Utmost for his Highest" in new language that makes a ton more sense. So far so good. Both of the last two days have really spoken to me. I have the old version as well but this one really stands out and speaks to me more. So if you're on the lookout for a devotional book, I highly recommend checking out the revised "My Utmost for his Highest."

first youth meeting...

2007-07-08T15:48:00.000-06:00

T- 1 hour until my first youth meeting as youth director. I think everything is in order but I'm surprisingly nervous. This morning I joined the church here. I got to the point where being a member in Illinois where I cannot give my presence, gifts, or service (I can still do the prayers part) just didn't make sense. When you join a UMC, you agree to give your prayers, presence, gifts and service. I can do that here with ease and really felt like I needed to make the move and join the church here. It was a funny process for me though because I've been here 2 years and a lot of the members of the congregation consider me to be family. I got hugs upon hugs upon hugs this morning standing in front of 3 separate worship services, and truly do feel that was the right move for me. I guess it was just odd to have them all welcome me when I've been here for awhile. Leaving Illinois Great Rivers behind was a huge step for me, but it really needed to be done.

Tonight we're eating, talking a bit of logistics, playing some games and then having discussion on a music video by Linkin Park. It should be a good time but I have butterflies in my stomach nonetheless. I probably won't have a huge group as a lot of my youth are on vacation, but the ones that show up will have fun. Once school starts back up I'll have a distinctive program but for a few weeks we'll just be doing games and having a lesson related to something in pop culture. With working two jobs for a month that is about the extent to which I can come up with anything spectacular. It makes me feel a little inadequate, but hopefully the time I've put into this week and next week (and I won't even be there next week) will show that I care about what the youth do each week even if it isn't exactly how I want youth group to look. It should be a good afternoon though but now I'm going to go finish getting ready and spend some time in prayer for the youth before they get here.

On a related note, oh how I love working on Sunday afternoons. It is quiet, the phones don't ring, and I can get a ton of stuff done. It is definitely great.

youth ministry office

2007-07-06T16:05:00.000-06:00

Part of this week was spent making the youth ministry office my own. Of course, the office has been mine the last 2 years just in a different capacity. I cleaned out my other Saranam office last week, and this week I got the Saranam stuff taken care of in the church office and then set to work on my office.

Here is the result. Yes, it doesn't look like much but it was a huge deal to get done and make the space my own. I still have some shelves to attack with curriculum from the 80s and 90s to sort through and get rid of, but that is a task for another day when I'm not working 2 jobs and up to my eyeballs in trying to figure out how to do this whole youth ministry thing. I mean, I have volunteered and stuff but it dawned on me that I have to come up with program after program each week which is a daunting but wonderfully fun task.

So here's my wonderful office!

quick break from newsletter...

2007-07-06T12:17:00.000-06:00

I'm working on a newsletter, and there is hardly anyone in the office today so it is relatively quiet. Every now and again we have people come to the front desk and ask for bus tokens or lunches which we don't give out on Fridays because we've usually run out with the weeks supply earlier in the week.

Today, a guy came up to the desk, picked up the bell that is normally rung to get someone's attention and stashed it away in his backpack. I was busy in my office, and suddenly heard "Did you just take my bell?" from the front secretary who had come up to the desk.

The guy was stealing the bell. He gave it back oddly enough, but it was a really strange experience to witness from my office vantage point. Reminds me of last year when I was getting lamps out of the storage unit and a guy just picked up a lamp and took off with it. Sometimes people go for the most fascinating things as far as taking stuff. There is probably plenty of other interesting things to take in this church that aren't at all secured, but this guy tried to steal the bell from the front desk. Bizarro.

made it through the day...

2007-07-02T23:07:00.000-06:00

Today was my first day in the office having 2 jobs. I'm finding it hard to keep everything all straight in my mind, but ultimately it went ok. At some point I mentioned to the associate pastor who was in that I probably need time set aside to do each job, but I couldn't really think about setting that up when I was in the thick of things.

I had a lot of left over things to do from the mission trip, a staff meeting for Saranam, some office rearranging which is harder than it sounds, a meeting with someone at the Saranam storage unit, then back to try to figure out a little bit of long range planning because I was thinking about it. At some point I was standing in the office common area going through the trash from my office seeing if the former youth director threw out anything I might find worth using in youth ministry. I got more than one comment that I didn't have to dig through the trash to find lunch. Haha very funny. I did find some stellar programming stuff and threw the rest away.

I managed to finally make it to lunch at 3:30 only because Tracy came in and wanted food. I evaluated my hunger situation and decided that I probably could stand to have some lunch at some point rather than continue to eat leftover cantaloupe from the BBQ yesterday. We went out and talked about the prospective people taking my job, then headed back.

I didn't leave until 5:40, and I was the last one out of the office. Something tells me that might be a normal thing for me. As each person left they told me to not stay too long. Thankfully I had a Bible study appointment to get to, or I might have stayed way longer. I just have so much to get done and there is not enough time in a day for me to get it all done. I'm definitely going to have to rely on God in this one if I want to stay the least bit sane.

I was hoping to have some events during the month to just hang out with the youth outside of Sunday nights, but I don't know if that can happen until August when my mind isn't trying to get two jobs done. We'll see though I guess.

I think I am definitely in need of prayers to get through this month being the overachiever that I am. I know that youth directors are prime targets for burnout, and I would prefer that doesn't happen to me. At this point, my love for it all overcomes any chances at being burnt out. Thankfully I already am involved with an amazing support group of other youth directors in the area who I meet with on an almost weekly basis. We never leave each other without asking "How is it with your soul?" And we don't take ok for an answer.

So despite how the day slipped past me while I was up to my eyes in work, my soul is in a good place. I'm feeling energized by the prospects of new ministry, I'm excited that I am in a job that I already love, and I can't wait to really dig in, dig deep and let God do a lot of amazing work. I am blessed to be in a church that is incredibly supportive, isn't afraid to hire a young youth director, and is ready and willing to make some change.

One of my favorite quotes comes from the end of a Mary Oliver poem, and this quote has been coming to mind a lot for me in the last few days. For me, this is it. This is what I choose to do in this precious life right now...

The Summer Day
by Mary Oliver

Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean-
the one who has flung herself out of the grass,
the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-
who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.
I don't know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?

where did the week go?

2007-07-01T17:02:00.000-06:00

Well it is July. Which means the heat is in full swing down here in the southwest. My computer is telling me it is 96, and though it is a dry heat, it certainly is still hot.

I survived my trips, not without excitement of course. Our mission trip was nothing short of amazing, God has blessed me with an amazing group of youth, as well as amazing adults to work with.

So here is a trip run down, and the reason that I haven't gotten to this yet was that I have been playing catch up. Who knew that being gone for 2 weeks straight would cause me to get so far behind at work and in life. Now that I feel sufficiently rested, it is time for an update...

We worked at Lydia Patterson, a school for kids who basically know little to no English coming in. Most of the kids live in Juarez and travel across the border each day to go to school. We did a ton of painting, fixing up some areas for them, some yardwork, more painting, and did I mention more painting? We also managed to work ourselves out of a job. We had intended to work from Monday - Friday, have a fun day on Saturday and head back on Sunday. Instead, we worked Monday - Thursday, had fun on Friday and a lot of Saturday and got back on Saturday night. It worked out better for a lot of us and I am thankful that I have some really flexible parents so that we didn't have any troubles coming back earlier.

I did all of the nightly programming, and got out of a little of that with some other stuff we did. On Sunday we got there and got settled and had opening worship, Monday we had worship and games, Tuesday we went up to the lookout point in El Paso and worshipped up there. Wednesday night we went to another youth group's meeting and hung out with them which was good for our kids to be a part of, then Thursday the school threw us a big party/cookout. We had our final worship on Friday night which was an amazing witness to me of where our youth are at and where we need to be headed. It could not have been a better closing worship.

We of course had fun the whole week but also had fun on the way down and back. We took a little detour on our way down to visit White Sands National Monument and slide down the dunes. It was hot, and I want to go back in say October and try that again, but it was a good time. Friday we headed over to Carlsbad and went swimming in the river, which was kinda gross but a good way to end a hot week. We also made an attempt to see a bat flight out of the Carlsbad caverns, but we got rained out. We spent Saturday going down 750 ft into the bottom of Carlsbad caverns which was about the coolest thing ever except for my fear of heights. We hiked down, which is about a mile walk which surprisingly takes about 45 minutes because the whole time you're walking at about a 30-45 degree angle. It was cool though I think that if I go back I'll just take the elevator down.

On our way back, we had a crazy tire blow out on the trailer, but it all seemed to work out and we got back safely.

Overall it was certainly an amazing trip. On Thursday the other adults were asking me if I still wanted to be youth director, and I could honestly say, yes.

So today begins the journey. Finishing up one job, officially starting another, and seeing where God continues to lead me. It certainly has been an interesting journey so far, and something tells me I haven't seen anything yet.

Blogging may be sparse in July due to working two jobs, but I think it is a spiritual discipline that I need to keep up as it helps me really reflect on the journey that God has been leading me on, so I hope to really get back on it one of these days here soon.

End Term week…

2007-06-17T01:06:00.000-06:00

(It is way too late for me to go through and link to everything... I will hopefully go back and add links when I get back next week, but for now it is a blogging hiatus for a week)

It is fairly surreal to be really done with the US-2 program. Leaving my friends that I have been so close to for the last 2 years was difficult, but it was ok because we all chose to say see you soon. We’re planning our own reunion, and are thinking about doing it in the great state of New Mexico during Balloon Fiesta in October of 2008. For sure, we will all come together again at some point.

This week has certainly had its ups and downs, all of us dealing with the past 2 years of service sometimes causes serious emotional distress. I got here on Saturday and hung out with Tiffany. We were the first to come in because we couldn’t get here on time on Sunday, so we got to fly in a day early. We went to church on Sunday morning at Origins church, which was a really good experience. You can check out the podcast by checking out Origins website. It is certainly a sermon worth checking out.

Sunday, Sarah had arrived early in the morning and slept while Tiff and I went to church, then Bre was there when we got back so we all went and grabbed lunch at our favorite brunch place, artepasta. Mary walked by and joined us as we finished up and headed back to AMH.

By that point everyone was there, so we went out to dinner and spent the evening hanging out. It is always amazing to me just how easy it is to be with the group. Though we come from different places and different backgrounds, we all mesh so amazingly well.

Monday was our first day to share, and we also did a GBGM podcast. I’ll link to that when it goes up. Monday night, of course we went and sang some karaoke because that is what we do on Monday nights.

Tuesday was more sharing and then we worked at getting to our feelings about the last 2 years. We did that both Tuesday and Wednesday, which was really difficult but ultimately rewarding. Processing 2 years of service in difficult situations certainly was an interesting task, but it was something that needed to happen.

Tuesday night was really cool because it was the Museum Mile Festival. We headed over to the Met, got in for free, wandered around and then met up with our first MIRYAP Barbara for dinner. There were street performers along the mile, and although we only went in the Met (because it is huge and there is some cool stuff there), we had a ton of fun.

Wednesday was good, we talked about our feelings again, but then Wednesday night was also pretty tough because one of our classmates had to leave early. Her husband had a death in the family, so she headed to be with him and to travel back home to Ohio for the funeral. It was hard saying goodbye, and the rest of the week wasn’t quite the same without her.

Thursday we went up to the Church Center at the UN and participated in a seminar called art as social change. We made masks to reflect who we are, we created a song about our experiences, and watched some movies about social issues. We then took a tour of the UN and had the craziest tour guide ever. That night, I met up with my friend John who had moved from Albuquerque to NYC in January. He came out with the rest of the group and we definitely had a great time.

Friday was our day off, so we got up and went in to China town. We did lots of shopping, and saw some crazy things. I got some sub par Boba tea, so I am excited to get back to Albuquerque and get some stuff that is good. The place we picked for me to get some was a really annoying restaurant instead of an actual boba tea place, so I was a little disappointed because they don’t specialize in it.

We headed back and tried to figure out what to do for Bre’s birthday, and decided upon this City party nights cruise that was a 2 hour cruise around Manhattan. We had lots of picture taking opportunities, and went by all of the cool sights of Manhattan. It was a fantastic way for us to end our term together for sure.

This morning we had our closing worship and all took off for the airport. I got to sit in the airport for 3 + hours because we all shared a taxi into LaGuardia and had to come early for some other flights and then I got delayed even further of course. I basically had a rough air travel day today and though I was supposed to get home before 8, walked into my house more like 12:15 am. Now it is a bit of sleep then off to El Paso for the mission trip. It will be a fantastic trip, no doubt, but I certainly am going to have to call on some energy from God to get me through it. Thankfully, once it is over, I have a chance to breathe a bit.

safe in NYC!

2007-06-09T17:11:00.000-06:00

For once I am the first US-2 to make it to Alma Matthews. The positive of this is that I get to be here an extra day, the negative is that I get to sit around and wait for other people to show up. The first should be arriving any time now, then the rest tomorrow.

This should be a time of relaxing, hanging out with some amazing people, eating good food and just in general having fun.

I'm about 90% done with stuff for the mission trip which is a lot further than I was last week. I managed to get a lot of it done during the craziness of music camp and answering questions and following kids around making sure they weren't hurting anyone or anything.

It is crazy for me to look back earlier in the summer about how much this travel stuff in May and June was going to be rough. It certainly has been, but God has blessed me with great friends to help me through it all, and some amazing stamina to get through it. I could certainly stand to not get on a plane for awhile though. It is amazing how much plane flights just wear me out. I still have a lot to get through though, but I am certain that God will keep me going through it all.

I think I'm gonna go get my book while I'm waiting for other people to get here. Just seems like a good time to get a little more reading in. More on what I've been reading is forthcoming for sure...

music camp, a broken car, and traveling lots...

2007-06-07T22:36:00.000-06:00

This has been music camp week which came right on the heels of being at home for Avery's baptism. I've also been a maniac about figuring out stuff for the mission trip this week as I will be in NYC next week for my end term event as a US-2.

Music camp is this phenomenon that is really like no other. This year, around 50 kids have descended upon the church to put on a musical. They learn the songs, their lines, and have fun doing it during the week and present it on Sunday. I didn't help last year because I was at annual conference in Illinois, but this year I'm here helping instead of back there doing the voting thing at conference. A shout out to all my Illinois Great Rivers folks at conference.... wish you were here... ha! (notice, I didn't say wish I was there.... I'm hearing the stories about how ridiculous the voting has been so far for GC)

I take off Saturday to hang out with my US-2s one last time at Alma Matthew's, but leading up to that, my car died. At a busy intersection. My friends came to the rescue and got me out of the jam, but it was a less than pleasant experience. But after a new alternator and spending almost all of my salary for a month on repairs, my car runs again! Thankfully I should be able to make it through the end of my term ok financially as long as no other major thing breaks on my car before I finish.

I've been talking about cupcakes and where to go to church Sunday in the city, and what we'll be doing and when we get in via email with the other US-2s this week. I am ecstatic to see them but already thinking about Saturday when we all leave NYC. It is gonna be so strange to be done with this program for sure, but it will always be a part of me and hopefully we'll all try to keep up with each other as we part ways. It really is an amazing group of young people that I am so thankful to be a part of.

When I get back, it is a night at home then back on the road to the mission trip. I'll probably blog from NYC, but I don't think there is internet access anywhere near us in El Paso, so stuff from that may have to wait. They both should be great trips but I have a seriously busy day tomorrow getting ready to go on both of them. It is definitely going to be a busy two weeks!

more on the gathering...

2007-05-31T12:46:00.000-06:00

Well I made it back from Fayetteville, and now am in Illinois for my niece's baptism on Sunday. It is somewhat of a whirlwind of a trip for traveling 1500 miles.

My travels yesterday were less than pleasant, so I'm hoping that my trip back will be better.

So a few more thoughts on the gathering... I met some amazing people, dogblogger, Ben and a bunch of others like Michael, Marcia and Melody...

Here is a picture of Tim doing some teaching...

And Doug doing some teaching...

And Mike and Billy leading us in some praise time...

Here is the New Mexico delegation. It was good to hang out with these guys as I don't get to see them too often other than Jeb the guy in the hat who I see now and again with youth stuff in Albuquerque.

I'm still struggling through what I've learned, but here are some quotes that I managed to copy down and still need to sort through...

"You don't get to complain about anything that you are not willing to fix."

"I want to find life, and chase it."

"The kingdom of God is living in the rhythm of God."

"Fear is powerful but it just doesn't motivate. Possibility has to motivate."

"Now that you're saved... what next? What if we've got it wrong and you aren't saved from something by God, you're saved by God for something. "

"Faith is detached from imagination, creation and what it means to be human beings made in the image of God. Our structures and rhythms reinforce that… being Christian ends up detaching us from reality."

"We should see worship as a corporate public spiritual discipline designed to shape us communally in a way that we cannot by ourselves."

"Do you want a church for you or do you want a church for your great grandchildren?"

Of course there are lots of other things I could say about everything that went on, and I am quite certain that the whole event will affect me in really profound ways for sure. I'm really excited for next year's event and hopefully will even get in on some of the planning of the event. In any case, I'm glad I got the opportunity to go and make some connections with South Central Jurisdiction folks.

An interesting observation...

2007-05-25T08:04:00.001-06:00

I've loved the worships we've had thus far here, good discussion, good singing, but the most interesting thing has been that men are seriously outnumbering women at this event so there is just this interesting mix of mostly male voices while we are singing.

This is a rarity in churches, as it is also a rarity in churches for people to sing at all sometimes. But thankfully, this group isn't afraid to sing.

Ok, on to a new session.

not what i was expecting...

2007-05-24T09:32:00.000-06:00

I am not convinced that I know what I was expecting for this event, but holy cow it is blowing me away.

We're taking a break currently, and a lot of us are staying in here to watch the finale of LOST together.

I've got a ton of notes so far, and I can't wait to make sense out of them. I think there is so much going on in my brain that I really doubt I'll be "live blogging" anything because there is just so much to sift through.

I was saying to another person today that through today, only 24 hours into it, I have this tension of feeling both discouraged and encouraged. The dichotomy is astounding and is telling me there is much more to this story than I am beginning to scrape through to.

I'm fascinated by the story that's gotten me here to this place in this time, and I know there is a lot more to it than I can even begin to understand. I'm looking forward to working towards figuring it all out.

A quote to share to sort of put me in my place in regards to all of this so far....

"And the end of all our searching shall be to return to the place where we started and know it for the first time.” -T.S. Eliot

blogging generationxy

2007-05-23T13:04:00.001-06:00

I'm out of town at generationxy and will likely be doing some live/ sort of live blogging from it throughout the weekend.

Highlight so far... riding to the retreat center with Doug Pagitt and Tim Keel and Mark, one of the organizers. I got to hear all about Tim's trip to Africa and talk about the current dying trends in the UMC. We're meeting here to try and see what we can do about stopping it and getting some young adults involved in the UMC... should be good times.

two perspectives...

2007-05-20T11:54:00.000-06:00

Just a warning, this post is much more rant than I would like it to be, but if I don't get it out, I won't get it out, and for my own sake I needed to get it out. So be forewarned.

It is rare to get two sermons on the same scripture in the same weekend for me. Especially when the two churches I go to do not follow the Lectionary, so I always think it strange when they intertwine. It is also rare for me to have two teachings based on the same scripture that are on completely opposite ends of the spectrum.

Then Jesus told his disciples, "If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake will find it. For what will it profit them if they gain the whole world but forfeit their life? Or what will they give in return for their life?

"For the Son of Man is to come with his angels in the glory of his Father, and then he will repay everyone for what has been done. Truly I tell you, there are some standing here who will not taste death before they see the Son of Man coming in his kingdom. - Matthew 16:24-28

I'm a big fan of taking scripture in context. Of understanding the story within the story. You cannot use this scripture out of context. It is so easy to quote this scripture and use it in any way you please, to understand that giving up your life you will gain much is something that is pleasing to Christians who don't look at the entire scripture.

The line before losing your life is what I am seeing as important here. This morning, the pastor leaned heavily on the line "Let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me." Shane Claiborne, in The Irresistible Revolution made a solid point to this line for me and I just hear it reverberating in my head over and over again... for so long, the church has taught us to lay everything down at the cross, but fails to provide us with anything to take up.

Jesus makes it ever so clear that laying your burdens at the cross isn't enough. It isn't enough to say, "Yes Jesus, I am yours, now my life is going to be awesome." I don't think that's true at all. For most of the people I know who have the most exuberant faith, life isn't easy when you say yes to Jesus. Instead, life becomes pouring yourself out so that others may know life and life to the fullest.

I think this is all part of what I'm working towards. I'm pushing against ministries that are "me" centric, and seeking out how to be in ministries that are "kingdom" centric. I'm working on not thinking about what I can get... and thinking about what I can give. God has not blessed me so that I can be a happy content Christian, God has blessed me because I need to pour out blessings on others. It is not enough to just go to church every week, it is not enough to "live life to the full" so to speak unless I am working towards making the lives of others better.

I guess what I am getting at is something that my friend Tara shared with me last night when I was filtering through how I was feeling, and that is that I cannot be satisfied unless my goal is to make this world a little more heaven and a little less hell. If you ask any of my families what hell is, most will say they've lived through it. If you ask anyone who is living on the street what hell is, most will say that they are living through it. I cannot stand by and be happy and content when I know that the world around me is suffering.

God offers us more. God offers us more than material things, more than being adventurous, more than a perfect life with a perfect family with a perfect job. God presents us with an opportunity to take up our crosses, to live like we mean it, and to open our hearts to others no matter what the cost is to us.

I feel for the rich young ruler (Mark 10:17-31) who walked away from Jesus because giving up his stuff was too much for him. I fear that too many of us would react the same way to Jesus that he did if Jesus were to ask us what he asked him. John Wesley, one of my heroes, said this.. "[When I die] if I leave behind me ten pounds ... you and all mankind [may] bear witness against me, that i have lived and died a thief and a robber."

Convicting. Am I to this place where I can say the same thing? No. I'm not. And I struggle with it, I think we all do, but one thing that I think is important is that I am aware that it is something I am going to continue to work on.

Holy cow... growth!

2007-05-17T11:26:00.000-06:00

Last year, my call into youth ministry hit me hard again obviously. This started with our mission trip to Denver. 9 of us in a van. 7 kids. 2 adults. We had an awesome time, but I was hoping we would work towards having a larger group go on the mission trip this year.

Well our deadline was Tuesday, and it looks like we've got 17 18 going. 13 youth and 5 adults. And the cool thing is that only 1 of the adults going is a parent. And he is one of the cool parents. We're really excited about the whole thing. Now I've just got to come up with some completed forms and get them out in between all of my crazy trips. More on those later, but I just made the realization of how God has blessed my prayer and nearly doubled last year's group size which is awesome!

Edited to add: I mean 18 people going, I had one more youth that hadn't gotten back to me so I added her in. We have now officially doubled the number going from last year to this year. Amazing.

El Paso & Juarez pictures

2007-05-14T23:23:00.000-06:00

Houchen community center: a place we might do some work at.

Lydia Patterson Institute: Our main reason we're going to El Paso, we'll be working here at least 3 of the 5 days that we do work.

You might be in Mexico if... it is amazing how much changes when you get into Juarez. Street signs included.

The alley right before where we worked with Pantera. The guys that we were working alongside said that 3 or 4 years ago, this alley was always in the news for being a place where people were found murdered. That isn't the case anymore. These guys have worked towards cleaning up a seriously bad part of town and are doing amazing things.

Of course, my obligatory self-portrait. In Mexico.

Looking back towards El Paso from up at the food bank in Juarez. Awesome view, but hard to swallow how destitute the houses were surrounding us.

El Paso and Juarez...

2007-05-14T15:28:00.000-06:00

So this past weekend I went on a scouting trip to El Paso for the youth mission trip this summer. We had a chance to go into Juarez to do some future scouting, and some mission work down there. It was by far one of my best weekends since I moved down here as I was really touched by the groups that we visited with.

We spent the first day visiting Lydia Patterson Institute and Houchen Community Center, both of which are groups we are planning on working with in June. We then met on Friday night with a pastor who just got back from the Democratic Republic of the Congo to see if that really is where we as a church would like to go on our family mission trip next summer. It was amazing to hear his stories, and a group of us are beyond excited to go to the Congo next year.

On Saturday we visited with a couple of ministries going on in Juarez, and helped with some mission work in some rough parts of Juarez. The poverty difference just walking across the border was astounding. There were people everywhere in Juarez, and so much need. We met with one man who found Christ in prison and does ministry with the drug dealers, prostitutes and other derelicts of society down there. His story was impressive, and I am still being changed by the the willingness of his heart to be in ministry.

We also spent some time with a retired couple, who took us around Juarez, deep into the heart of the city to where we could really see more of Juarez. We met with an incredibly sweet 80 year old woman who they visit with every week, and then handed stuff out windows to people in the streets. It was really awesome seeing the relationships that they have with the people on the drive towards the bridge.

God truly blessed my time there this weekend and really began planting some seeds in me in regards to these border ministries. I can't wait to see what comes out of this trip for me.

What does a missionary do with her time???

2007-05-07T22:49:00.000-06:00

Why volunteer of course.

I've been feeling slightly overwhelmed as of late, probably because I sometimes lack the ability to say no. Most of the things I can't say no to are things that are volunteer work. Stuff with counterculture comes up from time to time, stuff with the youth group that I am not yet the director of but still serve in a volunteer capacity, and as of late, I'm helping out my friends over at Mountain TOP to get some stuff ready for the summer.

When I was on staff there, a lot of our time was spent filling out what we called FUP sheets (Family Unit Profile) basically there were just crates and crates and crates of these sheets. I even have a great picture of me sleeping on the crates... ok so maybe it was a staged picture. But I'm sure I was tired. What can you expect on 5 hours of sleep a night?

In any case, these sheets were glued to our palms the whole summer, and we would have to rewrite the ones that we went to visit. I learned how to write really fast that summer I think. Sometimes I would even have nightmares about those yellow sheets.

Well the good folks on the mountain are going digital, so I'm helping by putting some old sheets into their new database. Good times for sure. I always feel guilty that I can't help in other ways for an awesome ministry that I love, so now my nights are filled with entering data and being flooded with old memories of ages past. Ok, so maybe it was only 5 years ago. But still, a lot has happened in those 5 years.

In any case, blogging has been sparse, and this is no excuse, but with gearing down at one job to gear up at another, you must forgive me. I wish I had some amazing story to tell about stuff that is going on at work or something, but right now it is quite the opposite of good stories, and I'm just not really ever in the mood to tell bad stories about stuff that is happening. Hopefully I'll have some great stories to tell as I get closer to being a youth director. After all, I do have some awesome trips with the youth and others over the summer that I am certain will at least provide a story now and again.

Response magazine article...

2007-04-30T16:01:00.000-06:00

Many might recall that I had an article that I was writing for a magazine way back in January. I got it today, so if you see a Response magazine lying around, check out the Bible Study as I wrote it and am featured prominently in it. My awesome friend Tiffany also has an article in there. If you for some reason can't get your hands on the magazine, let me know and I'll get a copy of the article to you if you would like to read it.

awesome weekend

2007-04-30T00:00:00.000-06:00

I spent the weekend in Dallas with my brother and sister-in-law and my niece Avery. This was my first time meeting her, (she is all of 3 weeks old) and we had a fantastic time even though we didn't do a whole lot. It was a super relaxing weekend for me just to get away from work and stuff. I really enjoyed the time I spent there, and have completely grown to love the little kiddo Avery while I was there. I am so ecstatic to be her aunt and godparent, and am so glad that I got to meet her this weekend. It was definitely hard to leave her for sure, and I am certainly counting down the days until I get to see her again!

community

2007-04-26T23:13:00.000-06:00

I’m about halfway through Shane Claiborne’s The Irresistible Revolution. Amazing so far. This is what church is to me, I just haven’t been able to really put words to it in a way that he does.

I’ve really connected with the importance of community that he stresses throughout the book, and was struck by a situation we are going through at work right now.

A few months back, a family left. We actually asked a part of the family if they wanted to stay, and it just didn’t happen. It definitely should have, but it didn’t. In the last few days, this part of the family has been calling and writing emails to us, and even stopped by today. Both my boss and I are trying to figure out why we’re ok with it all, and why it is so good to see her even though the situation upon which the family left was a hard one.

I think it ultimately boils down to community. Claiborne says, “It is a beautiful thing when folks in poverty are no longer a missions project but become genuine friends and family with whom we laugh, cry, dream, and struggle.”

That’s what it is. I am so fortunate to be at a placement site where I really get a chance to know these families. I was worried when I first came that I wouldn’t have enough to do, but I’ve found plenty of course. God has placed some amazing people in my life, and I am privileged to call some of them friends. I wouldn’t trade the interactions for anything. The Bible Studies, the long car rides taking people to appointments, hanging out in my office and just inviting people to sit and chat. Hearing what they have to say about church, about community, about struggles and about each other, I will walk away changed.

So it isn’t strange to be embracing someone who left. It is just part of community. It is about loving each other even when things don’t go well. And they don’t always go well. They didn’t always go well for Jesus so we can’t expect they will always go well for us. But this is what ministry is all about. Relationships. Community. Loving one another no matter what.

postmodern, millenials, etc...

2007-04-23T11:20:00.000-06:00

I met yesterday with the Education Hub to do some long range planning, and though we're not at all done and have just started the conversation, it was a good one. We started out talking about how ministry is going to be different for these generations, because of everything that has changed so rapidly within the last few generations. I am on the edge of being a millenial (born 1982-2001ish), and have some Generation X (born 1964-1982ish) qualities because my brother was squarely in Gen X. But for the most part I understand Millenials, because I am certainly one of them.

We talked a lot about postmodern thinking is going to affect ministry, and discussed absolute truth, which really brings me to my ultimate question that the Children's ministry director and I have been asking each other, and that is, "What is it that is so foundational to my faith, that without it, I can no longer live the Christian life I lead?"

For many postmoderns (approximately 60-70% of millenials are postmodern thinkers), the answer is going to be one filled with mystery I would venture to say. Or really I would even say that the question would cause someone who is postmodern in their thinking to ask more questions. That's my initial reaction to the question at least.

I remember a really great theological conversation that I had while sitting on a porch in Costa Rica very early in the morning. We were up, ready to go work, and suddenly this discussion of the virgin birth came up. And whether or not we believed in it. The ultimate answer for us came in the form of a question about why it matters. The understanding of the context for many of these "core beliefs" is more about the story for me. The relevancy for me lies in why it is important. The importance of understanding the virgin birth is to understand the human and Godly nature of Jesus. Many of these stories for me have meaning far beyond their literal understanding. Jesus spoke in parables in order to teach lessons from a different perspective. He didn't just lay everything out in purpose or mission statements. He didn't make it easy for his disciples to get it. I think that is because there is more to it than we can possibly begin to understand. There are some stories that I don't get. I don't understand their purpose. I get frustrated that I just don't get it, but when I remember the larger part of the story then I understand that maybe I am not supposed to get it all. And I'm ok with that. I'm all right with living in the mystery.

I know that many people would probably question me when I say these things. But I've never been one to be ok with really stringent rules. I like to do things my own way, and I think as ministry keeps happening in this world we're going to have to be able to deal with these questions, and maybe that means asking more questions and being ok with not having the immediate answer. I'm not ever going to say that I've got God figured out, because frankly, I just don't think it is possible to have God figured out. It is part of the mystery of it all.

So what belief for you is so important that if it disappeared tomorrow then you would no longer be able to live your life as a Christian?

social justice issue of the month...

2007-04-20T09:42:00.000-06:00

I started doing social justice issues of the month oh back in July and I just was never able to keep up with it. So here is this month's rendition of it and next month is likely to be determined and happen at a later time than in a month. The reality of the matter is that I am busy and though I read tons of social justice news, I haven't had the time to get actively involved in stuff. Lame excuse, I know, but one day, I'll get less busy and be able to pour my heart into more stuff.

There are an estimated 300,000 children in the United States that are forced into child prostitution. There are programs such as International Justice Mission that are trying to put a stop to this both at home and abroad.

What can we do? For now, I've been trying to learn as much as possible about the situation. My good friend Jeremy just came up with a website where he is planning on helping people get informed about the situation. Check it out. Learn something. Then do something about it.

ministry never stops...

2007-04-18T21:20:00.000-06:00

It seems that since it is now public that I am staying here, I am doing about 3 times as much work as I had been before. It is fun, but definitely tiring, and this week has just been tiring in and of itself with the whole Virginia Tech thing. It just seems to take an emotional toll on anyone and everyone I come across.

Today, while reading the biographies of the people that were murdered, the whole thing became a lot more real. One girl was from Champaign, IL, a city I still regard as home in many ways. She was a member at a local UMC in the area that I attended a few times. Reading a statement from a pastor I know, about a girl a few years younger than myself, made it ever so real.

Then reading about a girl from Annandale, VA, a town that holds a special place in my heart even though I've never been there. I still wear a shirt given to me by a youth group there, a group that attended camp at Mountain TOP the year that I was on volunteer day camp staff. I still remember a lot of those kids, they were a great group. I would imagine that most of the kids from there knew the girl that was from there, they are all about the same age as she is and they all attended Annandale High School with her.

I don't know what the proper reaction is to this whole situation. Right now my heart just seems to ache when I read CNN, or hear people talking about it, or bring myself to think about it. It just continues to break my heart.

a sad day...

2007-04-16T15:27:00.000-06:00

I've been sitting here the majority of the day just watching CNN update the coverage on the Virginia Tech shooting and I am in utter shock. Violence of that caliber astounds me. Although violence is occuring throughout the world every moment of every day, these acts where someone takes vengence for no rhyme or reason always just seems to surprise me.

I remember in 6th grade, we were sent home with a note that a 5th grader had brought a knife to school and proper actions were being set in place to keep all of us kids safe. There was genuine concern for safety once it had been breached.

I was a sophomore in high school when Columbine happened 8 years ago on Friday. The reality of the situation was felt throughout the country, and I couldn't imagine what it was like to be put in that horrifying situation. I remember distinctly the feeling of fear as televisions in classrooms were turned to watch the scene unfold. This could have been our school, these could have been our classmates.

Today, as I sit in an office a mere 100 yards from a college campus, I feel the same sort of sadness I've felt as countless events like this have unfolded. My prayers go out to those in the situation. The victims, the families, the friends, and the family and friends of the still unidentified shooter. Healing is necessary for everyone in this situation, and those that the situation is affecting. I pray that God may use this event to open our hearts and minds and call us to action in order to work towards peace.

well now that it is official...

2007-04-11T17:28:00.000-06:00

I am staying in Albuquerque.

God has called me to take on being a youth director here in this fine city for the church that I currently work for. It has been an amazing journey for me as I have struggled with figuring out just exactly where I need to be in ministry, and I am beyond excited now that I have made the commitment. I will be starting after I finish up my US-2 assignment at the end of July.

I have been richly blessed by my time in the ministry I currently work in, but it is time to do something that I get excited about. And for me, that is youth ministry. I have felt and understood my calling to young people since I was in youth group, and of course everyone questioned that because I couldn't know what it was like to do ministry with youth until I wasn't a youth anymore. I planned my degree to complement the youth ministry I wanted to eventually do, and so now I get to use it.

I'm excited about the possibilities I have with the current ministry and am really excited to do some new innovative stuff. I already have an awesome connection with the youth here so it should be a pretty smooth shift. It is hard for youth to get a new youth director, but hopefully this transition will be easier than other transitions I've heard of.

So yay for awesome jobs and knowing what I'm going to do when I am done here!

Holy week is almost over...

2007-04-07T15:01:00.000-06:00

Ok, so my niece is adorable. This is a more normal picture of Avery Jane, not taken from a camera. They made it home yesterday. My mom is headed down a week from Monday I think, then I'm going to down the weekend after that. Pretty much from here until the end of May I am beyond busy. And let's be honest, this summer doesn't look any better.

So I've made it to Holy Saturday. I actually will be celebrating Easter tonight at counterculture. Last night we reflected on the 7 last words of Christ and ended in darkness. It was an unbelievably long service but was all in all pretty good. The relief is almost there among church staff so that's good.

Tomorrow morning is Easter egg hiding. I'm leading the youth group in the morning as we hide 1400 eggs or so for the annual Easter Egg hunt on the lawn. Should be a good time.

It is a tiny picture but...

2007-04-03T09:31:00.000-06:00

I am an Aunt! :-)

The gathering...

2007-04-02T14:37:00.000-06:00

I just got all registered and squared away for a trip to Arkansas at the end of May to attend The Gathering. Should be a good time to get to know some other young adult leaders in the UMC and meet some people and hopefully reconnect with some that I've lost touch with. It looks like it will be a good conference minus the fact that my flight leaves at 6 am to get there. Oh well.

I like going to these kind of events though, they fuel me in a way that I can't describe. Getting back into the whole emergent scene is something that I have been thinking I need to do, I've done nothing but read books and introduce people to it as of late, and haven't been an active participant. I think that the United Methodist church can have a future for young people, but only if young people take some initiative and really get to work on being the body of Christ in a world that is ever evolving.

Entering into Holy Week

2007-04-01T21:49:00.000-06:00

Palm Sunday today. For some reason, my church doesn't give out palms to just regular attenders. You had to be a kid in the choir or an adult in the choir to get palms. In any case, singing "All Glory Laud and Honor" was a good way to start my morning. There is something about a king riding in on a donkey that gets me every time. It is just sort of confusing and exciting all at the same time.

This week is busy, filled with a ridiculous amount of meetings. And of course worship on Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Tomorrow is my mom's birthday, and if all goes as planned, Tuesday brings the birth of my neice. There is some major fun at the end of the week with our pretzel day activities at the church. Thankfully, after this week ends, I've got Monday next week off.

I of course will start my ridiculous ritual of listening to Jesus Christ Superstar at some point. I'm still looking to see if I can find a Seder dinner to attend on Thursday. There is something incredibly moving about this whole Holy week experience. This one should be a good one for sure.

I started Shane Claibourne's book but it is taking a tremendous amount of energy. So today I started Rob Bell's new book, and it too is taking a ton of energy. I think it may be time to read a book that doesn't require me to rethink everything that I know. Of course I have about 10 books on my bookshelf still waiting for me to dive into. And none of them are mindless, and I think pretty much all of them will challenge me in some way or another.

So for now, I'll keep reading. I'll have some free time here soon with my Disciple Romans ending, and a couple of other things just falling into place and opening up some doors for me to have a little more time for myself. Hopefully that will stick and I won't just go and put more in my life that takes up time.

some thoughts on music

2007-03-30T15:00:00.000-06:00

Today as I was driving around town this afternoon finishing up a bunch of things, my ipod popped up with The Beatles Let it Be. It reminded me of back in high school when our church youth choir sang that along with One Tin Soldier. Apparently we needed to sing some songs from the 70s, who knows.

In any case, as I sang along as I often do (and probably look ridiculous doing), I started thinking about that time, and about how the words of songs really affect me. I hadn't ever heard One Tin Soldier before, but it was amazing to me as we sang it, what power stood behind the message of peace.

I don't make it any secret that I don't like mainstream Christian music. Oh, I own plenty of it, but I generally don't like it. Mainly because I don't think that it is always telling a message. Worship is great, I love worship, but I want to be changed by the whole service, not just the message. I've been attending traditional worship again on Sunday mornings (for a long time I was going to the "contemporary" service) and I rediscovered my love for hymns. Oftentimes, I see hymns as ringing true to the heart, and not just being repeating stanzas of nothing that we just sing and raise our hands to because we are expected to. They aren't these kind of creepy love songs that in recent years have become so popular in worship.

When they aren't sung as dirges, and use more modern language, hymns can be a powerful testimony of the Kingdom of God here on earth. The vast majority are based solidly on scripture, which is more than I can say for a lot of contemporary Christian music. For me today, I experienced God while singing Let it Be. We don't have to have Christian music or other "Christian" labeled things in order to get a glimpse at the divine. We just have to be open to God speaking, and be ready to listen.

yay for reading!

2007-03-23T12:07:00.000-06:00

I've been doing a ton of reading lately in between my prep for Bible study, work, and trying to keep up with my friends. Sometimes when I list all of the stuff that I do I am astounded that I have time to sleep. But I've even been sleeping better, so I'm doing everything at reasonable hours.

Since the beginning of March, I have read George Barna's Revolution, finished up Mike Yankoski's Under the Overpass, read Anthony Bloom's Beginning to Pray, and am almost done with Chloe Breyer's The Close and then will start Shane Claiborne's The Irresistable Revolution.

Revolution was one of those books that was good to read, but didn't really do much for me. It was from a more conservative perspective than my own, and talked about how Christianity is going to have to change for it to stop dying.

Under the Overpass was good but there was a lot I wasn't too happy about. Two college guys decided to travel around the country for 6 months to experience life being homeless. In the intro, the guy that wrote it explained that life on the streets was tough, and filled with colorful language and dicey situations. He had to leave this stuff out because it was a "Christian" book and his publisher wouldn't allow it. One thing I've learned about ministry with homeless people here in ABQ is that life isn't easy any way you shake it. Reality can be rough, but it is reality. I almost felt like the book couldn't really explain the difficulty because he had to leave out dicey situations. I'd love to see a reprint of the book under a different publisher that actually got into the nitty gritty pieces of life on the streets. A lot of people have told me that this book changed their life and understanding of homelessness. I say that you can't really change your life and understanding of homelessness unless you have friends who have been there or are there yourself. That is something I have come to truly appreciate in my time here, and not something I think I would understand from reading a book.

Beginning to Pray is a book that I think everyone should read. It moves prayer from being a spiritual discipline to being a way of life. I'm blown away by the whole concept and plan on reading the book again in about a month and see how I've changed since then. If you haven't read it and want to be more serious in your prayer life, read it. If you are baffled by prayer, read it. If you think that you are the best at prayer ever, read it. Basically... read it.

The Close was a free book, I got to hear the author speak when I was at Princeton at the beginning of the month. It is about life the first year of seminary and the struggles that one goes through. In a lot of ways, the struggles are similar to some of those I've already faced when I changed my major and when I decided to run off and go be a missionary. The book is good, but probably won't be one that I make people read. It isn't about deep theological ideas which is good, it is more about life and what goes on in life as far as being someone who is called to ministry goes.

I'm excited and scared to read The Irresistable Revolution. Mainly because everyone that I know that has read it has walked away changed. And I'm not talking an easy change, I'm talking about radical shift change. Hopefully that will be how I will come out of it as well, but asking for change is sometimes a scary feat.

So... if you read this, what is one book you can recommend that I read? Or two or three... I've got time.

yay for little friends

2007-03-19T14:49:00.000-06:00

This is my friend Nora. She's the coolest 4 and a half month old that I know. I mean really, we hang out lots because I work with her mom, so how could she not be cool. I was picking out pictures for our newsletter and ran across this one and decided it needed to be shared. Not in the newsletter sense (because that would be weird) but in the blogger sense.

Pretty soon Nora gets to go to daycare, but for a bit longer she'll continue hanging out with me and her mom while we work.

Coming soon in baby picture blogging, I'll be an aunt at the beginning of April. There will probably be way too many pictures of her on here. The whole family is ridiculously excited about her arrival. We totally can't wait.

overrun by life

2007-03-18T22:10:00.000-06:00

Someone asked me today what all I've been up to. My answer was that I have been busy having fun. I've been hanging out with friends more than usual, which is a good thing for me, but has not left me with a lot of time to sit and think up clever things to say.

Today I started reading a book called "Beginning to Pray" by Anthony Bloom who was a Russian Orthodox Priest. So far the book is blowing me away and really forcing me to rethink the act of prayer.

The first major point of the book, found in the first chapter is about the absence of God. Who in the world starts a book on prayer about the absence of God? This guy does, and it makes it phenomenal. Sometimes, I pray and get no response (at least none that I am aware of), the lack of God's presence seems to be overwhelming in those times, and I often wonder where I can go to find God and reestablish this relationship.

So it struck me in this passage...

"If we could mechanically draw Him into an encounter, force Him to meet us, simply because we have chosen the moment to meet Him, there would be no relationship, and no encounter.... A relationship must begin and develop in mutual freedom. If you look at the relationship in the form of a mutual relationship, you would see that God could complain about us a great deal more than we about Him. We complain that He does not make Himself present to us for the few minutes we reserve for him, but what about the 23 and a half hours during which God may be knocking on our door and we answer 'I am busy or I am sorry' or when we do not answer at all because we do not even hear the knock at the door of our heart, of our minds, of our conscience, of our life. So there is a situation in which we have no right to complain of the absence of God, because we are a great deal more absent than He ever is."

Right to the heart there. This perspective is fresh. I've never been comfortable with genie in a bottle God. The one that we call upon when we need something and a rub of the magic lamp can bring it to us. Life just doesn't seem to work this way. But what if we can have that consistent mutual relationship? What if we can open ourselves up to 24 continual hours of communion with God?

Often I think people see that or hear that as a possibility and don't think about it seriously because they haven't been called into a ministry job. Sometimes people think that it would take some sort of monastic life to be that devoted and listen to God constantly. I think that this holy and spiritual communion can be something everyone can have. It can truly be an awesome part of our lives to seek to live this way.

So the next time I'm crying out, the next time I go to God in prayer for something I want, and I don't feel the presence of God, I will remind myself that it isn't God that is the problem, it is me. I love being on the 2nd page of a book and being confronted by something that is so powerful it really makes me do some self-examination.

awesome

2007-03-11T21:31:00.000-06:00

I have had one of the coolest weekends spent with friends doing some awesome things. I've been feeling so blessed this season of Lent that it doesn't even feel like Lent typically does for me. Usually Lent is very introspective, but I've got enough of that going on with trying to figure out what I'll be doing when August starts, so I figured I didn't need much more of that.

So I went out to dinner with my friend Leah on Saturday which was great because we haven't had a lot of time to just hang out lately. It was good to just sit and talk. We were going to go to a movie, but she was too sleepy so I went over and hung out at Jarrod and Whitney's house with Whitney and Chris, their roommate and a couple of other people. Jarrod was doing a lockin with his kids, and we just sat around and watched a few episodes of last season's 24. It was a fantastic way to unwind.

In the midst of it all, I was housesitting, and there is nothing better than coming back to a cat and a couple of awesome dogs. Saturday I got up and got going, and was at Billy and Tara's in the late morning to do some painting with Tara at their new house. We had a good time talking, and both agree that painting is somewhat therapeutic which is always good. That night I led worship with Tara at counterculture as well.

This morning I taught some of the social principles of the UMC to a Sunday School class. They loved me. And I loved teaching them. I've got 2 more Sundays of that, and then will have a curriculum to use to teach others. Awesome.

I came home, went out to lunch with friends, then went back to painting at Tara and Billy's. Then it was Lazer Tag time and other fun things at Hinkle Family Fun center. That was good times for sure. I had no idea how fun that was, but I am pretty sure that my team kept shooting me. It was a good night.

So, I was really busy all weekend and even managed to make it through losing the hour last night relatively unharmed. Hopefully this week is slightly more calm than last week. Lots of craziness happened at work. I do know there is some drama that I'll have to deal with this week, but hopefully it will all work out in the end. I just know there are lots of meetings in store for me in various areas of my life. And my general feeling about meetings right now is that meetings = one less opportunity I have to be in ministry.

Discipleship conference part 2

2007-03-08T23:49:00.000-07:00

Well I've discussed the implications of splitting Jesus up and each group claiming a piece of him. The problem with this sectarianism is that we fail to see the beauty of Jesus as a whole. Certainly I would think there are more than 7 different perspectives of Jesus. These are the ones that McLaren has seen but certainly there can be other views. I think we miss something if we concentrate too much on our own personal Jesus and don't see Jesus for who he is to other people.

Now where we can go wrong in this whole story is our understanding of the gospel. McLaren shared a story about a meeting with another theologian. This other theologian told McLaren that he had precisely no idea what the gospel is.

So what is the gospel then? And what does it mean?

When remember that gospel means good news, I think we can see that it also means the Kingdom of God. Jesus spoke often about this kingdom.

I have to laugh a little about McLaren’s view of the contemporary gospel. It goes something like this

The gospel = How to get to heaven when you die
With a large footnote about personal happiness
Smaller footnote about character development
A Much smaller footnote about spiritual experience
And an illegible footnote about social and global transformation.

This reminded me of that whole post I did about moralistic therapeutic deism. We want to feel good about ourselves. But this isn’t really what God was trying to accomplish with Jesus I don’t think. I think there is more to it, I think there is some serious conviction in what Jesus has to say about what the good news actually is.

We have to remember that we are not the end users of the gospel and that this whole thing is about God’s love for the world. Why would God bother with it all if it was all about if we were happy or not? I mean, sure, I think that God wants us to be happy, but I don’t think that our faith should be based on whether or not we are happy.

I often hear that people choose a church because it of how they are fed by it. Is it important to be spiritually nourished? Yes. Should it be our sole decision for how we choose a church? Probably not…

But this is what we get when we dissect Jesus into 7 or more parts. We get this consumer idea of what Christianity can be, and we forget to be disciples. We forget that God calls us to be more than just consumers of the gospel. We pick and choose what it is that we believe about Christ, and then suddenly we can pick and choose whether we care about others and whether we are Godly. I think we dive into some dangerous territory when we have this consumer driven society.

We’re supposed to be disciples. A disciple is someone who is living out what Jesus commanded. It is something we have to work on, not something that we can just sit back and hope that it happens. It isn’t something we can pay money for, it is something that we achieve from walking so closely behind Jesus that we feel the dust from his feet on our skin. It is something that people just recognize when they look at you.

This disciple living isn’t easy. In fact, it shouldn’t be. It should be a challenge. I’m always learning more about what it means to be a disciple every day. Some days I fail at being what Christ has called us to, but I am thankful for the grace of God in those situations because it allows me to start over again. If I am not consciously making the decision to follow Christ every day, then I don’t get the reminder about what a sacrifice that Kingdom living truly is.

I am still being changed today from that conference a few weeks back, and I feel like I’ll keep getting insights from it. I’m looking forward to McLaren’s next book, and am grateful for my ability to attend the conference. God continues to bless my time here for sure.

VEV conference

2007-03-04T23:20:00.000-07:00

I probably have a couple more posts about the McLaren conference. I'm in this serious mode of processing right now. It seems like I hit some conferences at just the right time in my life.

Because it is so fresh in my mind and I am working on processing it, and I process through writing, I'm going to jump ahead in time and talk about the Volunteers exploring vocation conference I just attended at Princeton. It was a conference put on by the Fund for Theological Education to encourage young adults who are in mission to consider going to seminary at some point. I think it also served as a way for young adults from different traditions who are in jobs like mine to connect. I met some amazing Mennonites, Presbyterians, Church of the Brethren folk among others.

I also got to hang out with some other UMCers... case in point. Here are 4 of the 5 of us standing outside of Magnolia Bakery. I am not certain you can be a UMC young adult missionary unless you have a strong desire to visit Magnolia when you are within 10 blocks.

So then we've got a picture of me with Adam in Salt Lake City. We are the 2 US-2s that blog with some regularity so we thought it fitting to get a picture together. We met up on the plane as he sat a row behind me. It is kind of funny to know someone solely through their blog, so I wasn't sure it was actually him. Finally we established the existence of each other and both had our headphones on fast to try to drown out the screaming 2 year old 2 rows ahead of me.

It was good to have a travel companion while navigating the NJ Transit system and the Princeton campus that lacked street signs. We were late, but we met up with a girl named Emily at Princeton Junction, so we didn't feel it mattered too much.

Adam brings a huge amount of joy anywhere he goes, so it was good times when he was around. This is me filling space now as I told him I would write 3 paragraphs about him. Hrm. Let's see. We talked about Mountain TOP some, and the state of his class of US-2s. And other things. Adam's a cool guy, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

So after a long journey, we hit the ground running. Wednesday night we spent some time talking in small groups and in a large group about everything that was going to happen. We also introduced our programs and ourselves which was fun. There are some amazing young people doing amazing things across the country.

Thursday was NYC day. We started off early, catching the 9ish am train in and we were at Holy Apostles Episcopal church which runs the largest soup kitchen in the city. If only every church would remove their pews in order to have space to serve food to the poor... then we ran up and got cupcakes and made it up to Union to listen to another Episcopal priest and a guy who makes documentaries talk about seminary and about life. From there, we took a walking tour of west Harlem, (basically really close to the General Board of Global Ministries so I know the area well). And then tried to get taxis to get up to St. Crispin's friary.

This is where we went wrong. Apparently, you cannot get a taxi at 4 pm to the South Bronx. It only took us 15 minutes, but that is a heck of a long time to try to get a taxi. We then prayed the Hours with some amazing Friars who are mendicants. They served us dinner (an amazing act of humility for men who rely on begging and donations to survive). Then the group split up. Some of us ended up at a jazz showcase, some went home, some had an interesting experience on a ferry, others went to times square then straight home. I of course hung out in the village and listened to some jazz. We laughed a ton, and walked back to the subway in the pouring rain. It was awesome.

Friday we heard from different people in ministry and spoke with some seminary reps. It set my mind at ease about going to seminary eventually so that was a very good thing. In the afternoon we had free time, which was much needed. We also had an amazing worship service that I was blown away by that night. Candlelit, sharing with each other in the form of a ritual of witness, and blessing each other with a rememberance of baptism. I won't soon forget the music, some taize done differently, some African spirituals, it was simply amazing and a blessing.

Some of us went out and walked around Princeton afterwards, which was a whole lot of fun and kept us entertained. We stayed up talking until late about life, trials of being in service among other things. Hearing the stories is an amazingly powerful thing.

Saturday was all about reflection and a difficult journey for me to get back here. At first, I thought I was going to get stuck in Atlanta, but then they switched my flight for me, and then wouldn't let me on my plane. God was good and I managed to make it home 2 hours before I was supposed to be back, but it was a difficult experience with some frustrated airline workers and me in my exhausted state. Thankfully, I made it home.

This week is busy again, but busy here in town and not anything out of the ordinary really. We're asking for money from the United Way this week, so prayers are appreciated on Tuesday morning. It will be a task for me to get back in the groove of things, and even though it was a busy weekend, it was one where I truly felt the blessing of God upon my life.

Christian Discipleship Conference

2007-02-23T22:31:00.000-07:00

I've been a busy busy busy person these last few weeks. Seems like when I get some down time, I just spend it trying to catch up with myself. I've recently inherited my mom's inability to sleep, but catching up in the form of naps is seeming to work for the time being.

In any case, tonight I went and heard Brian McLaren speak, and tomorrow is more of the same. Tonight's talk was entitled "The Seven Jesuses I Have Known." It was good, but not much more info than given in his books. This one seemed to be a summary of A Generous Orthodoxy. I still managed to take some new info from it. He talked at then about some stuff he mentioned in The Secret Message of Jesus as well. Overall it was good, but I'm hoping tomorrow will dive into some things that I haven't heard from him before.

So the Jesuses. I'll hit on them briefly and hit the stuff that struck me. Check out A Generous Orthodoxy if you want to know more of what McLaren thinks....

1. Conservative Evangelical Protestant Jesus
This Jesus is all about how we get salvation through Christ's death. Good Friday is probably the most important day for this group because Christ's death fixes everything.
2. Pentecostal Jesus
Jesus is something you experience. It is all about emotions.
3. Catholic Jesus
We get a glimpse of the risen Christ through the Eucharist. When we take the Eucharist seriously, we can take everything else seriously. There is no such thing as JUST a symbol.
4. Eastern Orthodox Jesus
This one caught me off guard but I loved it. He mentioned a book called Beginning to Pray by Anthony Bloom. I immediately came home and bought it used online. I like buying used books online. The most important piece of this Jesus is his entry into the world. When Jesus enters the picture, the whole world is changed. The other awesome part was his discussion of the perichoresis, the trinity is not just this chain of command thing with the Creator, Redeemer, Sanctifier (Father, Son, and Spirit) it is this beautiful dance. That image is really just moving around in my head like nothing else.
5. Mainline (Liberal) Protestant Jesus
McLaren said these were the ones he was told to be afraid of. Of course the room was filled with a bunch of Methodists. It cracked me up the whole time. Of course this is the Jesus I grew up knowing. The teacher. The one who talks about the kingdom of God being here and now. He talked about how he was taught that he shouldn't pray the Lord's prayer because it was just repetition and unbiblical... Huh... never thought that the Bible was unbiblical before.
6.Anabaptist Jesus
Jesus as a peacemaker. He talked about how there are many many non Christians who do this one better than Christians today. And how non-violence is really the only way to overcome division. When you use violence to overcome violence, violence always wins.
7.Liberation Theology Jesus
This is another on that intrigues me. Jesus says we are to take up our crosses. Crucifixion was reserved for political revolutionaries. Are we revolutionary? Or does our church work within a safe and quiet bureaucracy?

So why is it that we don't want to follow all of these different Jesuses? Why is it that we can't see Jesus from 7 (or more) perspectives? I'm comfortable with 5 and 6. 3, 4 and 7 intrigue the heck out of me. 1 & 2? Scare the heck out of me.

McLaren left us with this thought... maybe we're only comfortable with 1 or 2 of these because we don't want to be disciples. Maybe we just want to be Christians. I'm going to work on embracing these different viewpoints. Even the ones that scare me. Or at least coming to the point where I can truly appreciate the differences, and use that to understand this radical Christ that I've chosen to follow.

The beginning of reflection

2007-02-21T14:08:00.000-07:00

Today is Ash Wednesday. I wish I felt more prepared, in heart, in mind, in spirit, for this time of reflection. As I get closer to the service tonight, maybe I'll get more in the mood. I'm usually considerable more excited for Lent (strange, I know) but it is a season that I really like. I think it is because it appeals to my introspective side. But I also just like the struggles that you have to go through to get through Lent. The struggles we go through really make us stronger.

I think this is why I'm so inspired by the families I work with. Under serious amounts of adversity, they have strength that just astounds me. Sure, some of them can fall back into the traps that they have constantly been in, but some have been through some seriously tough stuff.

So tonight I'll head into the worship service ready to be open to what God has for me this season of Lent. Lots of life decisions coming up, should be a great time to work through them.

I'm a celebrity

2007-02-15T22:27:00.000-07:00

In December I posted at video blog. To do so, I put it up on youtube.

Last night I got a text message telling me that my youtube video was on the news.

This morning a few more people inquired about said video.

I am now a local celebrity. I was hoping they would put the story online (it was about snowfall here and how people are reacting to it via youtube). But it isn't online. So I didn't get to see it.

But still, having a youtube video show up on the news? Awesome.

Moral of the story, be careful what you put up on youtube, it might end up on the news.

snow day!

2007-02-14T09:05:00.000-07:00

Well last night I went to bed slightly jealous of my friends in Illinois because they were going to have a second snow day today. Well this morning, I didn't have to be jealous, because Albuquerque has shut down too. In snow that Illinois would scoff at, the city shuts down (or at least is delayed).

For your entertainment...

A picture of the snow in Illinois that my dad sent me...

Versus a picture of the snow in ABQ. It kind of makes me laugh.

But the world stops for this, and for me, that is ok.

product (RED)

2007-02-08T21:45:00.000-07:00

Well I've been saving up to buy a bluetooth headset and I thought that today was the best day to buy one since they made handsets illegal to use while driving in Albuquerque yesterday.

I did some research, and ultimately decided to pick up the product (RED) motorola headset because proceeds go to fighting the AIDS pandemic, specifically in Africa. I have mixed emotions about buying something seemingly frivolous, but I spend a lot of the time on the phone while driving, and I guess I justified it by knowing that there was some good I was doing.

As much as it is commercialized, this whole product campaign is helping get awareness out. I ran across this site of pictures from the recent trip of Sigur Ros to Swaziland. I've been a fan of Sigur Ros for awhile, but this whole site, the images, everything really speaks to me. We have to know what is going on across the ocean from us. We have to know that this is more than just a few countries struggling with the HIV/AIDS issue. We have to really begin to use the word pandemic when we talk about the crisis. It is a big deal.

We have to do something about it. Donate money to places like UNICEF, buy products where the proceeds go towards buying medication. Make yourself aware of the situation. I don't really care what you do, just commit to doing something. I watched the movie RENT earlier this week, and was reminded of the struggles that one had to go through in the late 80s when dealing with AIDS. Now, if you can afford treatment, you can live much longer than you could back in the 80s. In places like Africa and India, the cost of treatment is out of this world. People continue to be infected, and continue to die. Men, women, children. Everyone. This all happens because there isn't education there, and there aren't enough people paying attention here. Hopefully campaigns to raise awareness can change the way we think about Africa and the way we think about HIV/AIDS. We've got to start somewhere.

Invitation to Disciple: Romans

2007-02-08T14:57:00.000-07:00

I am a huge fan of these short term disciple studies that cokesbury has been putting out. Last night, we started Romans. I've done intro to OT, Genesis, and now Romans. I'm hoping I'll do intro to NT at some point, I just missed the class that was doing it last year.

Anyone that has participated in a Disciple study knows that there is a lot of homework. Thankfully these ones only meet for 8 weeks. I still managed to bring more upon myself by deciding to co-facilitate it. This is good though, because it gives me a reason to have to dig a little deeper and not just brush it off and not do the study.

So in our beginning class, we talked a lot about how Romans has influenced the church thus far. Romans is this book that runs deep. Last night we even discussed it as being this raging river that you have to wade through and sort through and struggle with. I dug that imagery. Many major leaders of the church have felt a profound impact on their faith due to Romans. From Augustine to Luther to Wesley, these major figures of faith have seen strikingly different things in Romans and have come away from the experience blessed... or perhaps having their heart feel strangely warmed.

Part of me was in a panic yesterday and didn't want to teach. Mainly because I don't always like or agree with Paul's interpretations of Jesus' message. This is a big text for Paul, and whether I like it or not, the church seems to be continually shaped by his letter to the Romans.

Is this a challenge? Of course. Am I up for it? Always. Will I struggle through the whole thing? I can only hope so.